Liz Jones is having a right proper moan over at the Daily Mail about the Children In Need campaign, which features a bunch of gorgeous women looking gorgeous with their faces bare of makeup and artifice. Heidi Klum (gorgeous!), Louise Redknapp (beautiful!), Lulu (stunning!) and host of other lovely ladies who look completely and utterly fantastic au natural.
Liz writes,
“I could go on and on about the money you will be seduced to spend to look like this lot, but suffice it to say these procedures have one aim: to make a woman ‘shower ready’. That basically means beautiful and desirable the moment she steps out of a shower with wet hair — which is apparently what men like.
So I say bare faced is the opposite of liberation, it’s enslavement to a bogus, male ideal of beauty, where even ‘natural’ no longer means what it says on the tin. It involves a heck of a lot of money. It’s not just irritating, it’s duplicitous. Not so long ago, female stars were not expected to look beautiful without make-up. Indeed, Marilyn Monroe, when she was caught outside her door after a stay in hospital, valiantly tried to hide her unadorned face.
I’d prefer these women looking the way Sarah Jessica Parker did, sans make-up, in the first Sex And The City film, where she confronted her fortysomething, jilted, disappointed face in the mirror. All dark shadows around the eyes, and a mouth like a dried-up river bed. When I saw it in the cinema, the women in the audience cheered.”
Oh really? Which women cheered, Liz? The ladies who are, in fact, “shower ready”, or the slags with pruny mouths and bags under their eyes and probably 30 pounds of fat hugging their asses? And which one are you, oh scion of beauty, with your facelift and life long anorexia?
It costs YOU a lot of money and time and effort to get from A to B, and whinging about women who don’t need a facelift to look great is just sour fucking grapes, pure and simple. It’s that cattiness again, women hating other women that makes life so bitter for everyone. A lifetime of insecurity and mental illness WILL show up in your face, no matter how many scalpels you sink into it. Is it possible that Heidi looks beautiful because she is happy and confident and satisfied with her life and accomplishments? Sure, she has magnificent bone structure. So does Liz, when you look closely. Liz could be a spectacularly beautiful person, but beauty isn’t just what’s on the outside. True beauty combines an outer visage with an inner happiness. Radiance comes from the heart.
JudgyBitch is one of those women who look GREAT coming out of the shower. I’m no beauty, but I take care of what I do have (hats and sunscreen, ladies!) and I am a fundamentally happy and cheerful person living a life I adore and that comes through in my face. I watch my weight (it helps if you can SEE your bone structure) and try and keep my hair in a reasonably sane state (with varying degrees of success). And what does it cost? Some drugstore face cream and the occasional eyebrow waxing and not a whole lot more. And yes, absolutely, being sexually attractive to a man is a prime motivator for me to do those things.
Shower ready, because apparently, that’s what men like. Hmmm. I’m having trouble understanding why this is a problem? Of course it’s what men like! Breaking news: men like beautiful women who look happy because they are happy! Alert the presses!
Once again, we are talking about women who sneer at men’s sexuality, which has a huge visual component. Ladies, what you LOOK like matters. It’s not the end all and be all, but it MATTERS and always has! Women like Liz Jones, who spend shitloads of money trying to be beautiful and then openly disdain the fact that men like women’s beauty are really just jealous, because DESPITE all the effort, they still don’t appeal to men. I have yet to come across a man who find Sarah Jessica Parker alluring.
It’s true that not all of us can look like Heidi Klum, but ALL of us CAN be beautiful. Liz Jones complains about the cost of “natural beauty”, without considering the cost of “made-up” beauty. Fake nails, fake eyelashes, fake hair, fake breasts, fake lips, fake body shape (hello Spanx!) – you can go ahead and try all those things, but without happiness, kindness, charm and grace, you’ll never be beautiful.
You can’t fake natural beauty. Go figure.
Lots of love,
JB
judgybitch 
Nicely said. A genuine smile that shines in the eyes, makes a woman prettier than a bucket full of makeup, hair color and flattering clothes, or surgery.
I am not beautiful by any definition, and I’m overweight, but I routinely receive compliments on my looks, particularly my smile. And significantly, many of those compliments come from older (60+) men who remember a time when such “pretty” women were everywhere. Additionally, men nearly as young as my son, respond warmly to my smile. They don’t find me sexually attractive, but they seem to find me appealing, and I don’t think they even realize it.
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Good work Ms Judgybitch. You couldn’t have stuck it to a whinier narcisist than Liz Jones. Trust her to get it all so wrong. Great site, delicious wit and breathtaking honesty. I am a fan.
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I don’t understand why women get jealous. It doesn’t make them prettier. If you are not blessed with looks, don’t think about it, pure and simple. No one else is responsible for the way I feel.
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