Country girls should be your kind of crazy, too!

10 Dec

country girl

So Victor Pride, who blogs at  got Jezebel’s panties all in a big bunch when he wrote an article about 32 things a man should do in his life.  It was really radical stuff too, like learn how to build something and shake hands properly.

Then Jezebel got wind of an article about how to attract shy girls and went bat shit crazy, because everyone knows scrotum-crushing sluts are every man’s secret wet dream.

Reading Victor’s article made me think of my own list about how to pick a wife, and it dawned on me that a lot of what Victor is talking about applies to rural girls, as well.  Women raised in small, tight communities where everybody knows everybody else have a very different attitude and mindset from women raised in large urban centers where people generally don’t know each other and pretty much don’t give a fuck about each other, either.  In a small town, you know all your neighbors.  In a city, you can live in an apartment block for 20 years and never meet your next door neighbor.

Knowing your neighbors isn’t the same as liking them or agreeing with them or hanging out with them, although that happens, too.  It just means that you are aware of one another and you are woven into a web, that like it or not, will hold you accountable for your behaviour.  JudgyBitch grew up in a bona fide small town (pop. 600), and most of those people lived on the outskirts of the town, on farms. The actual population of townsfolks was more like 250, and you couldn’t take a crap in that town without everyone knowing about it.  As kids, we feared every adult, because they would all step in and shut down whatever nonsense we had up our sleeves, without hesitation, and we knew that our own parents would not be calling up a lawyer to sue if you got your butt dusted by Mr. Henrik on the corner for stealing his snap peas, you’d probably get it dusted again at home for embarrassing your family.


That is unimaginable today, with helicopter parents and children raised to believe they are special, special snowflakes who are never behaving abominably, but always just being “spirited”.  I’m glad that attitudes towards striking children have changed so much and I firmly believe that if you hit your kids, you are a giant asshole, but the alternative does not mean you let your kids run fucking wild and disturb everyone else.  I have three children, all with wildly different personalities, and not once has any of them ever thrown a face down screaming tantrum.  Not. Once.  It’s called parenting.

Back to the subject at hand.  Victor likes shy girls because they are less likely to be sluts and more likely to be interested in a serious relationship.  The same is true for rural girls. Being a slut in a small town will get you socially ostracized fairly quickly, because sluts reduce the value of all women.

Liking sex and being willing to give it away are two very different things. I certainly would not like to go back to an era when you had to be married to have sex, and I’m thankful my children will grow up in a culture that permits sex outside the bonds of matrimony, but that doesn’t mean sex without a relationship.  I intend to promote sex as something two people enjoy as part of meaningful, loving connection with one another.  Sex with a boy or girl you’ve been dating for a while is fine.  Sex with the football captain on a throwaway Friday night is not.

That isn’t something you have to EXPLAIN to kids growing up in a small town.  They know it already, because they are deeply intertwined in the relationships and connections that surround them, and have been since birth. They understand that behaviour has consequences, and that they will be held accountable for poor behaviour. And that is the main difference between rural and urban women.

Obviously, not everyone can up and move to a small town, although if you can, I highly recommend it.  Women raised in a small town are worth an extra look, because if they have held on to those small town values, they may have all the same qualities Victor is looking for.  Don’t count on them being shy, though.  Country girls can be tough as nails and are unlikely to be taking any sexually aggressive shit from anyone, since they know what the price will be.

Emerson Drive has got it right:  She’s my kind of pony tail pretty, sounds like the country, looks like the city. She’s my kind of crazy.

That girl in cowboy boots over there in the cereal aisle?  Check her out.  She might be your kind of crazy, too.


Lots of love,


5 Responses to “Country girls should be your kind of crazy, too!”

  1. Sword December 10, 2012 at 19:08 #

    How ironic, I came to this conclusion about a month ago that the only ‘good’ girls left are the ones from the country, which is where I am from. The question is, how do you meet these girls though?


  2. judgybitch December 11, 2012 at 13:49 #

    I don’t know, Sword. In my experience, country girls have a very practical yet still feminine sense of dress. I can usually guess if a woman is from the country by looking at her footwear. Not much use for stilettos on the farm.


  3. Jason October 2, 2014 at 18:02 #

    I do love country girls. I think you’re right though, the lack of morality in the big cities hasn’t really gotten to the small towns yet.


  4. Jack Strawb January 6, 2015 at 23:51 #

    I couldn’t agree less. To start, the average person and average woman is not interesting. They don’t think in abstract terms, if you tell them something they forget right away, they have a distinct inability to take in and use new information; in short, the average woman anywhere is a bore. She may be a nice bore, a hard working bore, a loving bore, but intellectually she’s got nothing of interest going on. So much of rural life encourages closemindedness, insularity, ignorance, repetition. I know it’s unpopular to say, but the average person is a poor companion. Which leads me to note that interesting, intelligent, curious women tend to run like hell from small towns.

    I’ve lived in NYC and very small towns, both for long stretches. I like women, a lot. Rural women are no friendlier than urban women and, consistent with electoral demographics, are more often of that faux conservative stripe that is deeply paranoid, profoundly hateful of difference, prizes guns and the welfare or disability check and weekly free clinic while hating the government that guarantees it. There’s also none of the leavening that comes with living in a city and being constantly exposed to people who are nothing like you.

    Then there’s the matter of opportunity. In a town of 250 everyone may know everyone else, but the chances there will be someone suitable for you is small. An urban neighborhood can easily hold 100 times as many people and therefore 100 times as many suitable prospects. Anyone looking for a long term relationship with a good soul should run like hell from small towns.


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