I went to see the Silver Linings Playbook yesterday, and what a fantastic movie! Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence are just fabulous together. I found the story rather interesting, too.
Spoilers ahead, folks.
Cooper plays Pat, an undiagnosed bi-polar guy who found his wife in the shower with another man, snapped, and nearly beat the interloper to death. Instead of jail time, he was sent to a psychiatric facility where he steels his resolve to earn his wife back. She has a restraining order against him, but he wants to become a different person so they can continue what sounds like a perfectly horrid marriage. Nikki (the wife) cheated on Pat, and Pat wonders what he can do better?
Pat meets Tiffany, a young widow whose husband was killed in a traffic accident. She is extremely gorgeous, but has some kind of depressive/anxiety disorder herself, and is given to commit random acts of whoreishness.
The rest of the movie explores the relationship between wingnut families (Robert DeNiro as the patriarch of this bag of crazy is great!) and how and why certain people are considered dangerously cracked and other people are not. Really, Tiffany is just socially awkward and a little impulsive, while her sister is a straight up Emasculating Shrew of Biblical Proportions, and guess which one comes across as mentally unstable?
I loved the movie and found the ending very satisfying and I hope Jennifer wins the Oscar for her performance, but I left the theatre thinking about all the single men I know, and how often I have heard them recount dating stories ending with the aphorism: Single, sane, hot. Pick two.
Which one should you sacrifice? Ask any woman this question and she will say “hot”, of course. Men aren’t supposed to like women for their looks. Young women have been pedalled a myth that men’s interest in women’s physical appearance is evidence for the fact that men are shallow, stupid, brutes and that any man worth having will not care about how a woman looks. He will care about her mind, her personality, her accomplishments, her ambition, her intelligence blah blah blah. The categories are not mutually exclusive, ladies. Men like all those things, but they like how you look first and foremost.
Men who report the greatest degree of satisfaction with their partners have partners who weigh less than them. Being a little chubby chick doesn’t mean you will die alone with your cats (being a bitchy chubby chick is another story), but it does mean that the only men likely to be happy with you are those that weigh MORE than you do.
If you’re in for long term happiness, then giving up hot is a big mistake.
What about the single part? Yeah, she needs to be single. Completely single. No encumbrances of any kind.
So that leaves sane. Is this what you should sacrifice? Well, there’s crazy and then there’s really fucking batshit insane. You obviously don’t want that, no matter how hot she is. This is where we come back to the movie. Pat seems like a lunatic to me and I would never have lasted one date with a guy like that, and Tiffany is awkward and weird, but together, they just work.
At the end of the day, we’re all just a little bit crazy, aren’t we? The trick is to find the crazy that works for you.
Lots of love,