Yoo hoo! Hey all you career ladies with no time for a husband! And all you single mamas! And all you older ladies hitting the wall! I have the solution to all your man-hunting woes!

28 Apr

If you’re on the market for some serious scientific data to support your hypotheses about various types of human behavior (or anything else, for that matter), you need only look as far as Yahoo!  They do surveys!  With people!  They met on the Internet!  Why don’t we just let Yahoo take charge of ALL the science!?!

yahoo

Take this “study”, for example:  more than 40 per cent of single men and women simply don’t have time to search out their soul-mates.

Hey, n = 1000.  Good enough!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-184511/Workaholics-busy-love.html

Okay, I’m just poking fun at my source material, but there is quite a bit of conversation surrounding the fact that high-powered careers leave little time for the pursuit of happiness, and this is a cause of consternation amongst the ladies in particular.  Why, some of them even feel guilty for thinking that a relationship with a man might be nice!

http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2013/03/women-in-their-20s-shouldnt-feel-bad-about-wanting-a-boyfriend/273737/

God forbid you should suggest that women use their time at college to look for a husband though!  That’s just straight up oppression and misogyny!

http://jezebel.com/princeton-mom-feminists-are-bullies-women-in-their-30-476587551

Never mind that fact that college educated men aren’t the only ones worth pursuing! Ssssh.  We’re not talking about that. NO MEN EVER are worth pursuing.  If life isn’t about YOU and ONLY YOU, you’re doing it wrong.

ssh

http://judgybitch.com/2013/03/30/hey-ivy-league-ladies-if-you-want-to-marry-up-you-need-to-marry-young-so-get-out-there-and-nail-down-a-freshman/

luggage

And it doesn’t get any easier for single moms, either.  In some shocking news, ladies who come with more baggage than Heathrow’s Terminal One have a hard time snagging (the next) Mr. Right.  Nothing says “Pick me! Pick me!” like a long string of really poor decisions and a complete lack of self-reflection.

http://necolebitchie.com/2008/01/07/13-reasons-to-avoid-dating-single-mothers/

And once you reach that “certain age” and are hitting the wall in terms of looks and fertility, well, oof!  The search for Prince Charming just took a turn to GoodFuckingLucksVille.

http://observer.guardian.co.uk/sex/story/0,,1051274,00.html

The key to dating after 35 is to treat the entire process as a kind of mergers and acquisitions deal.

book

Greenwald is the hottest thing to hit America’s dating scene since Sex and the City. She is a slick graduate of the elite Harvard Business School who believes the ruthless rules of commerce can be applied to the hunt for a mate. Out go roses, chocolates and eyes meeting across a crowded room. In come ‘branding’ and ‘marketing’. Romance may not be dead inside this room, but it certainly seems to have gone corporate.

Oh my god, that is so romantic!  I can see the men lining up for a shot at one of these lasses.  The queue must go right around the block, assuming we’re talking about a lego block.

lego

But never fear ladies!  JudgyBitch is here to share her incomparable brilliance relating to bag of rocks stupid women who have no clue what men want or what will make them happy.

rocks

The solution to all your man-hunting woes is….

polygamy

POLYGAMY!

Bear with me now.

Let’s start with the busy busy busy worker bees.  Life is long, but the days are short, dammit, and there is just no realistic way to work 60 hour weeks as the senior editor of a fashion magazine (or whatever pointless fucking thing you’re doing, because it sure as hell isn’t likely to be curing cancer), fit in trips to the salon and the masseuse, get to yoga class, have drinks with the girls three nights a week, do some shopping, attend mandatory therapy sessions, update your Pinterest board and your status on Facebook AND have time for a man, too.

It’s just too much.  Overwhelming!  And obviously, you need priorities.  But the solution is so simple!  Let’s say you, and two or three of your best girls, get together with your laptops and compile your perfect man.  Locate the qualities that overlap in your mutual lists (Venn diagrams are helpful), and then find yourselves a man that meets at least one criteria for each of you and SHARE THAT MAN LIKE A LEMON MERINGUE PIE.

Important aside: best pie chart ever:

pie

It’s a win-win situation.  You all have money and can take care of your own bills.  Maybe you could chuck a cardboard box in the bottom of one of the closets for him to keep some stuff in on the days he’s YOUR husband, although a sturdy backpack might be a better option.  He doesn’t need to leave ANY shit at your place at all.

backpack

Men like variety, and have been known to get really sick of putting up with women’s shit on a day to day basis, and since you’re all special and unique individuals, it’s unlikely you’ll all be pulling the exact SAME shit, so he gets a welcome break (not from shit, just from YOUR shit).

http://sexliestruth.blogspot.ca/2011/04/sexual-variety-is-spice-of-life.html

Shouldn’t be too much work to write an algorithm that allows each of you to have one weekday and one weekend day with your husband, and for the rest of the time, you are as free as a little jaybird!

divide

Win-win, and you’re welcome!

Now, for the single mothers. Well, you have all gone and fucked yourselves quite nicely.  But hope is not lost!  Polygamy can work for you, too!  You’re probably going to be in need of a little cash to go with your shared sausage, so you’ll be hunting for a different sort of man.  He’ll need to be rich, or at least capable of supporting you partially, in addition to his first wife and family.

trailer

If you’re living in a trailer park in Arkansas, we’re not talking Donald Trump. A good solid middle class salary ought to suffice. Sadly, you won’t have the same kind of equality of status that the career ladies have.  You’ll have to settle for being the lesser wife.  Hierarchies suck, especially when you’re at the bottom, but you probably should have considered that BEFORE you decided to become a single mama.

You’ll have to focus on the BENEFITS.  First, your children will have some sort of male role model, and you should never, ever discount the importance of that.  Children need their fathers, and if they can’t have their OWN fathers, then someone else’s will have to do.  It’s better than nothing.  Second, you’ll have some help with the bills.  Becoming a single mother goes hand in hand with poverty, but apparently the meaning of the word poverty has been lost somewhere in translation, because millions of women continue to opt for that life, for both themselves and their children.

http://www.policymic.com/articles/11316/27-3-of-single-parent-households-live-in-poverty

And third, you will have a real, honest to god, flesh and blood husband!  You won’t have him full time obviously, and your scheduled times will be at the whim of the primary wife, but again, it’s better than nothing.  Think of how nice it will be for your husband, who doesn’t have to worry about all the bullshit intricacies and the tangled webs of infidelity and stepping out.  He can step out whenever he likes!  With his OTHER wife!

And if you’re smart, you’ll be sure to suck up hard to the Primary Wife, because she just might decide to babysit while you have your time with your shared husband.  How perfect is that?  Father figure for your child, a little extra cash, a man of your (sort of) own and a built in babysitter.

I’m a goddamn genius, I tell you.

And now for the older ladies.  The lonely cougars with aching ovaries who just left the whole husband and kids thing a little too late. Polygamy is your blessing, too.  Like the single mamas, you will have to accept a slightly downgraded status in terms of where you rank on the wife scale, but that’s not such a big price to pay, is it?  The alternative is life as a cat lady, so I think not.

cat lady

The older ladies, provided they have minded the shape of their ass and have cultivated at least SOME sexual skills can bring the pleasures of variety to a man minus all the difficulties of infidelity, and they have an outside shot at confirming his virility by producing that last heir.  And it’s not like you’d be a single mother, for goodness sakes!  Being a second (or third, or fourth) wife is still being a wife.

Polygamy:  just one giant win!  The ladies get a man, and all the benefits that come with that, and the men get a variety of booties to hit without all the drama that comes with cheating.  Obviously, there won’t be any drama of any kind in these sorts of arrangements, right?  What could the source of conflict be?  Maybe some scheduling squabbles?  Well, Christ, a good iPhone app can deal with that.  If McDonald’s can get that Happy Meal on the tray in under three minutes, you can figure out how to divide your time between a couple of families.

happy

Divorced folks do it all the time, just without the benefits of continued sex.  Easy peasy.

And if you think this whole post has just been one giant joke, you need to read this:

http://www.thesundaytimes.co.uk/sto/newsreview/features/article1248019.ece

Polygamy is the new face of Britain.  Can the rest of the Western world be far behind?

What can possibly go wrong?  Riddle me that.

Lots of love,

JB

91 Responses to “Yoo hoo! Hey all you career ladies with no time for a husband! And all you single mamas! And all you older ladies hitting the wall! I have the solution to all your man-hunting woes!”

  1. genderneutrallanguage April 28, 2013 at 16:33 #

    You forgot something. Polygamy means that only about 20% of men are actually marriage material. This means that 80% of the men out there are single, women will have prime pickings of these left overs when they choose to step outside of marriage for some fun.

    Like

  2. judgybitch April 28, 2013 at 16:40 #

    Oh yeah. Let’s make sure 80% of men have no opportunity to get married. This idea just looks better and better.

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  3. Bob Wallace April 28, 2013 at 16:54 #

    I am a believer in dowries myself. Since there is a perceived shortage of men, women have to pay for them. In societies with a perceived shortage of men there are dowries; in societies with a perceived shortage of women bride prices are paid.

    So, girls, get out there and start paying for us!

    Seriously, the whole thing is a bit sad. When women think men are supposed to pay for them (in one way or the other) such as asking them out, paying their way, making good money, the women are perceiving themselves as valuable.

    However, that value exists only in those women’s minds. Then they are shocked when men want little to do with them (mostly because of their unpleasant attitudes), which means men are now seeing them of little or no value. When the women get old enough, they find themselves of truly zero value and end up spinsters with cats.

    Some understanding of basic economics – say supply and demand – clears up a lot of these problems.

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  4. S.C.O.R.C.H.™ (@_Scorch_) April 28, 2013 at 17:25 #

    “Seriously, the whole thing is a bit sad. When women think men are supposed to pay for them (in one way or the other) such as asking them out, paying their way, making good money, the women are perceiving themselves as valuable.

    However, that value exists only in those women’s minds. Then they are shocked when men want little to do with them (mostly because of their unpleasant attitudes), which means men are now seeing them of little or no value. When the women get old enough, they find themselves of truly zero value and end up spinsters with cats.”

    ^^^ABSOLUTELY THIS.

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  5. Jim April 28, 2013 at 18:18 #

    Best part about polygamy is the hens would be fighting each other while the man simply disappears. Without notice.

    A friend of mine has a new woman in his life and last night I tried to get her to do a shot with me. Said she was driving yada yada. But then tossed in that she’d be driving him later on. I’m like what’s the fun in that. Didn’t speak to me much afterwards but kept looking at me for some reason. Told another friend that I smelled something about her. Oh I know what it is………………baby rabies. Yep, she’s definitely getting close to midnight.

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  6. Mike S April 28, 2013 at 18:28 #

    Ha. This is exactly where we are headed. Gay marriage is a fact of life other than working out the various legal fine points. Polygamy will be next and the speed at which it becomes legal will be surprising. And it will destroy, not just traditional marriages, but the Feminist empire.

    Once you pass beyond the traditional monogamous marriage, current Western divorce law fails. The whole thing will have to revert to contracts signed by the participants. Women seeking to exit a poly marriage and take the bulk of the resources with them will no longer be the only suffering woman in the drama. It won’t be a choice between the needs of one angelic woman and “her” children vs a dastardly evil male, Anything she gets will harm other angelic women and children. This is where the “best interests of the child” theory as currently interpreted implodes. It will be in the best interest of her children to leave them with their other brothers and sisters and moms and not give her their income stream. She can still go on her eat, pray, love adventure to find her true self, likely a lonely cat herder, but she won’t get to keep the dastardly male’s income stream any more. The other interested parties will have a better claim. And there will be other wives to offer counter testimony that she wasn’t abused. They may even circle the wagons and claim she is the bad actor. Just watching this play out will worth the costs of implementing polygamy.

    This will alter the dynamic of the current situation a whole lot. I believe the end result will be the end of Feminism and Progressivism and a radical shift to conservative values. The poly societies we have now are very conservative.The divorce & single momery social construct is the driver of Feminism and women demanding the nanny state protect them from the GOP’s well known War on Women. Polygamy is actually is the market solution to this. Right now productive males pay taxes to support all the irresponsible women, but the nookie goes to bad boys and 20 something jocks. And they have to pay a vast herd of government workers administer the wealth transfer. Taking care of single moms is the rational for the nanny state. No single moms, and half of it has nothing to do. Polygamy privatizes this wealth transfer. By privatizing it, the women get a better standard of living because there is no need to pay a government worker to oversee the transfer of wealth. Her breadwinner will support her and her kids directly and she will give him the nookie. Given a choice between a crappy project apartment and living on food stamps or being the third wife of a successful business man, smart women will save the money they currently spend on tattoos and junk food so they can build up a dowry and stay slim and attractive so they can catch a good man.

    Monogamy is the best solution for average women only when there is a good chance that the average guy can have a job that supports a family. And it is only a good solution for an average guy when he can count on a lifetime marriage to a decent wife. Once either of those conditions disappear, monogamous marriages will lose their appeal.

    Polygamy is the best solution for women when there is large income disparity and most men cannot count on having a job that will support a family. Then the rich guys get most of the women.

    Most women take the best deal offered to them. Once that was Ward Cleaver. Now it is the single mom route for average women and Liberal Arts majors, and cat pampering hard driving executive for college educated women who didn’t get useless degrees. When being third wife of a rich guy so you can live the rich life like Kim Kardashian becomes available, many cute slim ones will chose that. The fat tattooed sluts will end up in harem of the local drug dealer, which won’t be much of a change, but it will be all formal and legal.

    Like

  7. Bob Wallace April 28, 2013 at 18:47 #

    Polygamy in reality would be a very bad thing. There was a Mormon community that practiced it (and got busted up by the feds). When the boys turned 16 they were tossed out on their own since they would be competition for the 15-year-old girls married to older men.

    It is only in the West that the concept of romantic love exists – one man, one woman. Monogamy.

    I do not believe love can exist in polygamous cultures. How can one man love a dozen wives? How can any woman love a man when she knows he has 11 other wives?

    You might want to check out ancient China for a truly bizarre and loveless polygamous culture. A wealthy man might have a thousand wives of different ranks – wives down to concubines.

    Wealthy families had to pay a dowry to marry off their daughters, but poor families with an attractive daughter could get a bride price so she could be a concubine. Families who thought there was no hope killed their infant daughters. Which still exists today in China.

    How this will play out in the West I do not know, Maybe a wealthy good-looking guy with a soft harem. Guys on the bottom – no one. Unattractive women – spinsters with cats.

    But love? We might turn into a society where it is little-known. As Carl Jung pointed out, you can have power over others or you can have love for another – but you can’t have both at the same time.

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  8. Doc April 28, 2013 at 19:16 #

    We’re practicing Polygamy already, sort of – or at least the guys who are in demand are. I have several women I call upon based upon what I’m interested in, social, and sexual for the evening. The advantage is that it costs me nothing to have more than one on the line… Of course, I make it clear that there are no promises – they just make themselves available to me when I want them. If one is busy – no harm done, they are pretty much interchangeable… They are free to walk away at any time – and I am free to replace them at my whim.

    I love the society of today – all of the advantage of marriage and none of the disadvantages – I don’t have to listen or put up with all of the crap married men do, every woman is always sweet and on her best behavior when she’s with me. The only advantage of real polygamy would be a built in child-care system, but that doesn’t really get me anything since I don’t pay for it now…

    I’m just saying that women have effectively created a polygamous system now – although they age off fairly quickly. It’s mostly for women 18-30 – after that, there the baggage exceeds the fun… But they can always look for the much older men – I’m sure the 60 year olds wouldn’t mind a 35 year old… It’s just that they are getting kind of long-in-tooth for the guys that are in demand by the younger sweeties…

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  9. Xayadvara April 28, 2013 at 20:10 #

    Bah,

    One woman is trouble enough, now on top of that another 3 or 4?? Taking down a wolf pack with an umbrella has a better chance of success.

    Sadly, if such a thing becomes the norm – its like our culture has come full circle. Once upon a time in the forests, it was the male that could generate maximum kills and resources that had the most mates – the ones that had less resources simply died out alone. I thought that this part of human frameworks was behind us, depressing to see if it comes back.

    Like

  10. The Karamazov Idea April 28, 2013 at 21:30 #

    I would indeed call the current iteration of the alpha cock carousel an informal polygamous arrangement. Rather than having set households wherein an alpha maintains a harem, we have sort of nebulous shifting borders where alphas pick their harems and abandon them nightly. Ironically, it’s the women that get shafted as they get none of the benefits that even polygamy has to offer for stability.

    Monogamy is the only stable environment for families. Even the Bible paints clear derogatory pictures of polygamous patriarchs. Every single polygamous family in the Bible experiences strife for it, be it Abraham, Jacob, or David.

    The problem with monogamy is that women must be reminded that not everybody gets a hollywood prince charming. The solution is not to hold out for one, but to treat the man you end up with like he is Prince Charming, or better yet, the king. Marriages where the husband is king and the wife is queen raise happy, healthy, and morally good kids, at least they are statistically sound compared to their modern competition. Every movement away from this has brought us more unintelligent, violent, sexually loose, disaffected, and pathetic children than before. You’d think we’d learn.

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  11. TMG April 28, 2013 at 21:55 #

    1. You got it. The next Feminist – Leftist crusade is going to be normalizing polygamy. Count on it.

    2. Women, even older and average-looking women, could find a very good man if they followed the advice of women like Judgy Bitch or Venker. Be supportive, be nice (you don’t always have to be in a good mood but don’t EVER expect him to be a mind-reader), make him feel special, don’t ration affection (this doesn’t mean you have to have sex all the time) and don’t treat him like an employee, a wallet, a co-worker, or a gal pal. I’ve only had one girlfriend who came close to this. We broke up for good reasons, but it had nothing to do with how we treated each other.

    I am a dedicated MGTOW, but I would seriously reconsider if a woman would step off the feminist princess pedestal and be how I described above.

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  12. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 01:09 #

    One simple reason why it must be wrong: The man wins. “Men must never win” is the neofeminist First Commandment.

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  13. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 01:14 #

    “I am a believer in dowries myself. Since there is a perceived shortage of men, women have to pay for them. In societies with a perceived shortage of men there are dowries; in societies with a perceived shortage of women bride prices are paid.”

    Imagine the ruckus if single men started demanding nonrefundable, separate-property dowries as a price of getting married. Jezebel would freak, and single men would nod.

    Like

  14. someguy April 29, 2013 at 02:00 #

    when 80% of the male population got no motivation whatsoever, the alpha males and the females will have to actually become like chest thumping gorillas living in the woods cos civilization will not last long.

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  15. someguy April 29, 2013 at 02:07 #

    SO then what will happen to the other 80% of men who wont get any? I know some will become gay, but still. Or will most men have gone MGTOW when it happens?

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  16. Bob Wallace April 29, 2013 at 02:13 #

    “Jezebel would freak, and single men would nod.”

    One of the purposes of a dowry was to give the couple a leg up in getting started. Since the U.S. had a free market economy for so long it was easy for a man to walk in and get high-paying job.

    Those days are gone (wages stopped going up in 1973). If the economy had maintained the same growth rates as before ’73, the average salary would be about $100,000 a year. So who would need a dowry?

    However, since wages have stagnated for men (but not for women, due to Affirmative Action (“White Men Need Not Apply”), along with some other reasons too long to go into here, one way around these problems is for women to provide dowries for men.

    Of course women would be horrified, since many women have been raised to believe they should have all the advantages of a man and a woman, but none of the responsibilities.

    Personally, I am amused at it all, and wonder how things will evolve. I doubt it will be “evolve” – more like “mutate.”

    Like

  17. Z April 29, 2013 at 02:15 #

    LOL that would be funny.

    Like

  18. someguy April 29, 2013 at 02:16 #

    explains why radfems wanted 90% of men eradicated. Naturally it’ll be the ultra wealthy alpha males who will live.

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  19. Z April 29, 2013 at 02:22 #

    I think you’re leaving out women with money here. That they earned and maintain on their own. I’m guessing the other 80% of men will be a free-for-all for the women with money who don’t NEED a man to pay the bills. While many studies show that high-powered women (high-earning) want even MORE high-powered men. Super smart women who have money may figure out that they don’t actually NEED a man with money to be happy. If they DO figure that crap out… then in a world with polygamy and the 20% of alphas racking up a ton of wives, wealthy single women will have a LOT of men to play with, provided they can stand to be with nice betas. Or alpha-types who… for whatever reason… didn’t do as well with earning potential. (i.e. a man can have an alpha personality but not be rich. Wealth is great and one of those ‘alpha-indicators’ but we don’t all live on a binary.)

    Like

  20. Z April 29, 2013 at 02:22 #

    Also, I’m not sure what is up with my punctuation and sentence fragments here. Sorry.

    Like

  21. Z April 29, 2013 at 02:26 #

    Love is already little known because too many woman have bought into the ‘men are dogs’ BS. There is already too much of a “battle of the sexes” and lack of commitment in marriage now, making love a somewhat foreign concept to most. The other day I told someone I had a good man (we got to talking about men in general and husbands in particular), she looked at me skeptically like I must be a newlywed and asked how long I’d been married. I said 11 years and she was shocked. Seriously, people don’t know how to love anymore. This is not a new concept that is coming. It’s already here. If it’s shocking for a man and woman married little over a decade to love each other… yeah.

    Like

  22. Z April 29, 2013 at 02:37 #

    This is true. People keep going on about how once you pass like 35 it’s over. And there are men echoing this, too. The problem is… while they are speaking they are NOT representative of all male attitudes. I think maybe on the internet we get a slightly skewed perspective of what ‘men’ think of anything. ONE subset of men thinks a certain thing and suddenly it’s law. Talk about myopic.

    You know, I know men don’t like to hear this but THEY have expiration dates, too. You are only really HOT in your 40’s and 50’s if you are good looking and successful if you are male. At LEAST financially successful. You can still get what you want if you look like a toad but are a billionaire. (But rich women can have young cute poor guys, too. They probably won’t really love her, but do you think 22 year old hotties really LOVE wrinkly old rich guys? Really?)

    If you are a bum making almost no money and have a beer belly, NO, you cannot have 22 year old nymphettes. I don’t know who sold men this load of crap but that’s what it is. If you have MONEY, you can have what you want. If you are not an alpha and you do not have money, you can WANT 22 year old supermodels all you want. But that doesn’t mean it’s what you’re getting. Most intelligent men figure that out and settle for something more reasonable for what they actually have to offer. i.e. men, you can’t let yourself go, either.

    As for women over 35 being single spinsters, again, what planet are people on? I personally know a lady who got married at 52 to a great guy and she is NOT gorgeous, not even for her age. But she’s a great lady! I know another woman who has been married 3 times because she’s been widowed twice. The second time she got married she was in her 50’s. Third time… her second husband died when she was 68, two years later she was married again to a nice widower. She’s pretty for her age but she is not a 22 year old supermodel. These are not the only two women I know who got married later in life.

    Honestly, high-quality women are high-quality women until the grave. And with feminism, high-quality women are so rare that it’s probably even easier assuming you can prove yourself to a man (i.e. that he can trust you not to be “like the others”)

    Men in nursing homes still chase little old ladies. I don’t care WHAT they masturbate to. Who they actually end up forming relationships with is a different story. Women in their 40’s who end up alone end up that way because of their acerbic personalities and lack of self worth and not taking care of whatever they’ve been given, not because of some magic age they hit. Jeez.

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  23. Marlo Rocci April 29, 2013 at 04:33 #

    I’ve been pushing for polygamy for some time. After all, most American women only want to marry a millionaire these days, and quite frankly there are only a few to go around.

    And it’s not like these guys aren’t polygamists already, only we call it divorce. I ask “Why break up the family?”. After all, kids are involved and there’s no reason to screw up their lives just because their dad wants to trade in his old wife in for a new model (“model”, get it?).

    So while he’s picking out the next selection from the Victoria’s Secret runway, there’s no need to stop by the lawyers to have the previous unit disposed of. I’m sure she’s still for something, You know, cooking and cleaning and that kind of crap. Just tell her she’s not being divorced, she’s just being re-purposed.

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  24. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 05:35 #

    If a woman is rich, she’ll hire a poolboy. But she won’t marry him, and he’d better not step out of line.

    You know what you call a less-affluent alpha male who enters into an exclusive relationship with a rich woman? “A bodyguard.” That, or “a beta with delusions of grandeur.” A true alpha male, by definition, won’t be interested in a monogamous relationship, no matter how much money a woman waves in his face.

    Like

  25. Z April 29, 2013 at 06:55 #

    Are you saying you think an alpha isn’t interested in monogamy under any circumstances or just that an alpha isn’t interested in monogamy in THESE circumstances? Because if you’re saying the former, I’d have to disagree. You can’t pigeon-hole every alpha male by your personal fantasy of what an alpha is. Alphas by definition have no masters including the boxes you may wish to put them into to define them to your satisfaction.

    If you mean the latter, well… duh. I’m pretty sure rich women buying “pretty boys” don’t think those are “alphas”, but they might still have many of the alpha personality types but for whatever reason in the current economy, things just didn’t work out. By definition one might say an alpha is the highest earner, etc, but I’m not sure I totally agree. Human society is not really based on ONE hierarchy. There are hierarchies everywhere, and for some women, what they are interested in is a man’s level of dominance in relationship to her, or in relationship to one or two other life situations, not necessarily in relationship to every other male or human being on the face of the planet. Because no matter what there is ALWAYS a man somewhere more alpha, and then we get into hypergamy and grass is always greener syndrome, and frankly I just don’t think women who think that way can ever be truly happy because your “alpha guy” is going to be alpha in some situations and some social circumstances but maybe not every single one, and if he’s around enough different people you’ll encounter someone more alpha than him, but so what. Dude, we aren’t wolves out in the woods.

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  26. Liz April 29, 2013 at 08:54 #

    I live in a very affluent area, and even here it’s unusual to see a 35 year old woman with a 60 year old man.
    That’s like hooking up with Father Time. Do you see that often?

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  27. Liz April 29, 2013 at 09:03 #

    I’ve had the same experience throughout our marriage.
    For the first five years into our marriage or so, people would ask if we planned on getting married, assuming we were in the honeymoon dating phase (even now, we sometimes leave notes on each other’s cars, or in his lunch, a little surprise chocolate on the desk, ect). It’s been a long time now (our wedding photo looks like a highschool prom photo, damn we were young), still got it. Yet most of the people we’ve known through the years, who married later than we are divorced now. It’s really sad.

    Like

  28. Clover April 29, 2013 at 11:25 #

    I think you might be missing something kinda fundemental about people. Alpha or not, humans fall in love. The idea that an ‘alpha male by definition, won’t be interested in a monogamous relationship’ is simply not true, and it implies that being ‘alpha’ somehow denies a man normal human emotions.
    I’m not saying monogamy is the only way to go, but it’s certainly possible under the right conditions.

    Like

  29. Exfernal April 29, 2013 at 11:32 #

    Well… Read this as you like:

    […]The intensity of reproductive competition can
    be conceptualized in terms of the within-sex var
    iance in fitness. Competition is generally more
    intense among males than among females in that
    male fitness variance exceeds female fitness var
    iance. And although competition need not be
    confrontational and dangerous (or indeed direct
    at all), the likelihood of risky competitive tactics
    increases as the payoff variance increases: in
    any competition, the more disparate the out
    comes for winners versus losers, the greater the
    expected expenditure of effort and tolerable
    risk.
    Where within-sex fitness variance is large,
    some individuals are monopolizing reproduction
    while others are losing out. The degree of such
    monopolization of females by males is the degree
    of “effective polygyny” of the breeding system,
    and the more polygynous, the more intense the
    male-male competition. The more intense this
    competition, the more we can expect males to
    be inclined to risky tactics, and hence the more
    excess mortality they should be expected to suf
    fer in comparison to females.[…]

    Raise the stakes, and the fur will fly… especially in neighborhoods with the highest inequality of income and social standing. The “Police State” would be necessary to maintain the semblance of order.

    Like

  30. TMG April 29, 2013 at 12:50 #

    Whenever I hear an older woman bitching about men’s lack of interest, the first thing i think is “How stupid do you have to be to ignore the basics of human biology and sexual desire” and my second thought is “It’s not men’s fault that you have failed to develop attractive characteristics about yourself as you’ve gotten older”

    Like

  31. TMG April 29, 2013 at 12:52 #

    Most feminists are cool with elite males winning, it’s the average men that they want to see shrivel up and die.

    Like

  32. TMG April 29, 2013 at 12:54 #

    There may be many benefits to polygamy for elite men and their wives, but it is very hard on the children and it further denies average men viable options for mating.

    Like

  33. Liz April 29, 2013 at 14:09 #

    That’s right. True alphas never commit to no wimenz. And they make sure to do manly shite, like kill something each and every day.

    Like

  34. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 14:44 #

    A woman getting the man that every other woman wants — that sounds like YOUR fantasy.

    Men are naturally polygamous — every man wants to have sex with damn near every woman. So no, no, no, an alpha male doesn’t want to be monogamous, and he doesn’t have to be monogamous because women are throwing themselves at him. You know who’s monogamous, TRULY monogamous? Betas, guys whom other women don’t want.

    As fora woman marrying the number-two alpha who is outranked by another alpha male, guess what — she’ll cheat on Number Two with Number One. In a heartbeat. Why? Because she is hypergamous.

    It’s not a matter of “happiness,” it’s a matter of biology. The result is that the Number One guy in a place impregnates many women, while the Number 9,999 guy impregnates none, and so better genes are reinforced in the species.

    By the way, Z, I think it is hilarious that you, a woman, would tell me, a man, how Alpha Males think. That is so _feminist_ of you.

    Like

  35. danny April 29, 2013 at 14:50 #

    Wonderful! The new goal for a man, a time share husband with 4 or 5 wives. None of them will be able to cook, know how to raise our multitude of family, and will conspire new ways to screw the lone husband over while enjoying a meal of fast food in yoga pants and braided armpit hair. Blahhhgh!!!

    Like

  36. Erudite Knight April 29, 2013 at 14:52 #

    They could hop on okcupid, the odds are in their favor

    Like

  37. judgybitch April 29, 2013 at 14:56 #

    What about alpha males who have an alpha female? I’m going to go out on a “so full of myself it boggles the mind” limb here, but Mr. JB, who is a total alpha, would be hard-pressed to do better than me.

    He has no incentive to fuck around because he has three pretty damn near perfect offspring with me, he understands the implications of sowing his oats far and wide, and we have a great relationship he would be sorry to lose.

    I suppose we could make a distinction between how he FEELS (yes, he would probably like to fuck a lot of the women he meets), and how he ACTS (he’s not going to do that because he’s smart enough to know it would cause way more pain than pleasure).

    And the same goes for me. My husband is a great provider and partner, and also a pretty damn near perfect genetic specimen. I would be hard-pressed to find a better man.

    So far, my list consists of Ben Affleck.

    And maybe Lost Sailor *wink wink nudge nudge*

    How does that factor in to to the discussion? I’m genuinely curious. If an alpha male is interested first and foremost in having genetically robust offspring that survive to reproduce themselves, what is the incentive to endanger a relationship with an alpha female who can provide that offspring?

    Is there even such a thing as an alpha female, or am I just making that shit up?

    Like

  38. judgybitch April 29, 2013 at 14:59 #

    Based on the smells that emanate from the upstairs bathroom every day, I’m going to have to say that’s true.

    Jesus. Something died up there.

    Like

  39. judgybitch April 29, 2013 at 15:01 #

    They’re called the Lost Boys. It’s a seriously sad by-product of polygamy. As usual, the liberal media will weep oceans of alligator tears for the poor young women abused by polygamous cults, and completely ignore what happens to the young men.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2005/jun/14/usa.julianborger

    It’s a fucking disaster no matter how you slice it.

    Like

  40. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 15:03 #

    You’re implying that just because a male, much less an alpha male, falls in love, he will never cheat.

    Men who love their wives cheat all the time. Some because they crave sexual variety, some because the sex with their wife is awful, some because the sex is offered to them.

    Look at Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver. I don’t doubt for a second that he loved her. Yet he got the nanny pregnant. Willingly too, I hear.

    Like

  41. judgybitch April 29, 2013 at 15:04 #

    Honestly, high-quality women are high-quality women until the grave.

    I couldn’t agree more. The trouble is that feminism teaches women that QUALITY = OPPRESSION, and it encourages to women to jettison every lovely, desirable trait they could ever have and cultivate only those traits that will make CERTAIN men only want them for a quick pounding.

    Like

  42. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 15:22 #

    Yes, the alpha female is the most desirable female. As you’ve pointed out, the same physical traits that make a woman desirable, also make her qualified to make and feed babies.

    Ask your husband sometime, if sweet young things make a play for him, especially when both he and the SYTs are out of town. I’ll bet they do, and I bet he’s tempted. Even if he never says yes, I’ll bet he gets offers from women who know damn well he’s a husband and father, and those women make those offers damn appealing.

    I gotta disagree about Ben Affleck. He came thisclose to marrying Jennifer Lopez. The man lacks judgment.

    Like

  43. Clover April 29, 2013 at 15:29 #

    So, let say I point out that even though women are biologically pogrammed to want children, not every woman actually feels that way. Then I relate this to alpha males not all being the same, and while in general they may not be inclined towards monogamy, some individuals are. Will you then tell me that men who fit this exception are not ‘alpha’? Because there’s no point discussing it if you’re using a circular definition, especially when it doesn’t distinguish alpha males from every other guy who likes variety and gets it (and yes, betas can get laid too, women aren’t all that picky).
    If you’re not using a circular definition, how exactly are you defining alpha-ness?

    Like

  44. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 15:41 #

    But see what happens when they try to be feminist divas–

    Wife No. 3: “I am SO mad at you!”
    He: “What did I do?”
    “You know what you did! I shouldn’t have to tell you.”
    “Uh-huh, right. So anyway, you’re really angry…about something.”
    “I am. And because of that, I’m not having sex with you tonight. You can forget it, nuh-uh, ain’t gonna happen. What do you say to THAT?”
    “Well, that’s inconvenient. Now I’ll have to tweak the Sex Schedule. I guess I’ll have you and Doris change days.”

    Like

  45. Liz April 29, 2013 at 15:42 #

    Lol!
    Has to be an intentional kill though…accidentals and friendly fire don’t count. HAR!

    Like

  46. GrimGhost April 29, 2013 at 15:56 #

    Take any large group of people. Introduce a crisis. There’s one person whom everyone NATURALLY turns to and asks, “What do we do now?” After the crisis is over, the other men of the group have to earn sex with brownie points, but the Alpha Male is offered sex freely.

    Like

  47. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 16:06 #

    {Hey, JB, I thought that was on the down-low!}

    Nothing to see here folks, move along, move along…

    Like

  48. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 16:08 #

    On a more serious note, yes, there are alpha females, which I would term as women who are naturally confident in their femininity.

    Like

  49. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 16:20 #

    Hmmm. I don’t know. Polygamy may work for men with the means, but assuming (against Mike S’s comment) divorce laws remain consistent, the prospect of potentially 2 or 3 times the alimony and child support would likely put most men off a polygamous marriage. Assuming, too, he can see beyond the extra poontang…

    Like

  50. Mike S April 29, 2013 at 16:23 #

    My first comment was not an endorsement of polygamy, just the observation that it is coming. If nothing else, because with would be “oppression” of Muslims to not allow it. Since we can’t just make it legal for one religion, it will be legal for everyone.

    Feminists will think it is great because cat herding Wiccans can now have group marriages, but it is going to destroy the culture. We already have a polygamous hookup culture for hot girls and the few players and alpha jocks they all want. That will transition to rich guys having all the hot girls in harems. It will end up with 70 – 90% of the guys being Incels, (Involuntary Celibates). This will destroy Western Culture. Our culture depends on men producing surplus wealth to support families. Most wealth is produced by the working and middle class men who actually make things and create value. Without wives and families to motivate them to work hard, most will quit creating wealth. Men can accurately gauge their worth to a society by the quality of women who want them. When the only ones available are the dregs, you take a pass and work a crap job or become a petty criminal to get by and drink your life away. We are already seeing this in Black American culture. That will be the whole West once Polygamy finishes off our culture.

    The good news is, it will destroy Progressivism and all it’s sub cults like Feminism, and eco fanaticism, and the socialist welfare state. There won’t be enough surplus wealth to support it. Rich people do not create wealth, they just harvest it. There will still be aristocrats, but their standard of living will fall as the capitalist system fails. We will return to the Feudalism we arose from and live in a dark age until there is another Enlightenment, if there is one. Pretty much everyone on the planet was getting a free ride in one way or another on the labor of the middle and working class Western male. Now that he is not needed and can be tossed on the ash heap, the whole thing will collapse.

    Cultures fail when they damage the engine that was pulling their train. They never figure it out until it is too late. Everyone is too busy building a bigger stone head than the guys in the next village to notice that they have destroyed their food supply, until one day there is nothing to eat.

    Like

  51. Bob Wallace April 29, 2013 at 18:10 #

    “the prospect of potentially 2 or 3 times the alimony and child support would likely put most men off a polygamous marriage.”

    That’s not how polygamy works. The wives have to bring a huge dowry to the marriage, so the man ends up wealthy. And if one tries to leave with her kids and the money, what do you think the rest of the wives will do to her?

    That’s why there is no divorce in polygamous cultures, unless the man wants it.

    The creepy thing about polygamous cultures is that they can work, although creakily, if you don’t mind dumping your sons on the side of the road so they can be competition for the younger women, or have armed guards so those “betas” can’t blow your ass away because they’re got nothing to live for an occasional whore and drug use.

    Like

  52. Liz April 29, 2013 at 18:22 #

    The Achilles heel in the equation is that women don’t like women enough for this to work. I wouldn’t want to live with ‘sister-wives’ for the rest of my life, sharing a man. Think I’d find the prospect of cats (well, I’m allergic so make that girly yip dogs) preferable, or even a collection of sewer rats. At least they won’t bring drama into my home.

    Like

  53. Bob Wallace April 29, 2013 at 18:43 #

    It’d work if the force of law was behind it, which is why polygamous cultures in Arabia, Africa and China have worked and do work.

    One big problem with polygamous societies is that they are all poor, except for that one-tenth of one percent of bazillionaires.

    Western women should thank God for Western men and Western culture. Many are too ignorant to realize what a gift they have been given, and are busy trying to destroy it.

    Like

  54. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 19:17 #

    Bob, I understand that’s how polygamous cultures have worked elsewhere and how the Mormons tend to do it, but there is no reason that our modern liberal culture would follow those norms.

    JB’s point is that polygamy would be a “solution” to the problem that there aren’t enough “high quality” men to go around for all the fabulous women who want deserve them. If this type of polygamy were to ever be legalized here, it would be a feminist version of the practice. And so, since feminism does nothing that’s not primarily for the sole benefit of women, I don’t expect to see dowries (though I’m sure diamond engagement rings will still be expected) or changes in the divorce laws.

    The one amusement that might be had, assuming a man is stupid enough to go along in the first place, is if the wives can’t agree when it comes time to dump the hubby. The resulting cat-fights over the spoils could be highly entertaining…

    Like

  55. Liz April 29, 2013 at 19:19 #

    And religion. And deep-seeded social conditioning.
    Of course, by that measure, Communism “works” too, with the force of the law and/or religion behind it. True on the large scale or small (Monestaries and nunneries practiced communal living for centuries). Doesn’t make it optimal. Polygamy is currently illegal in China.
    And I for one am thankful to be living in western society.

    Like

  56. Clover April 29, 2013 at 19:40 #

    Wait, what? Saying ‘what do we do now’ is not equivalent to screwing someone. Not even slightly, ’cause that would make my entire childhood experience of after-school clubs hideously inappropriate.
    I also fail to see what crisis situations have to do with normal married/monogamous life. I know lots of guys who hold women to higer standards than casual attractiveness for mating, guys who are in relationships and don’t want to waste time on getting nookie from a dim bint who he doesn’t know when he has a woman back home to take care of his needs. I’m not saying some men don’t stray, alpha or not. I’m saying it’s perfectly possible to be powerful, confident and desireable, and yet still remain faithful. In my experience faithfulness is more to do with honor respect for the wife than a lack of viable options elsewhere. I’m sure there are other reasons, but whatever they are the fact stands – not all alpha guys are unfaithful.

    Like

  57. Bob Wallace April 29, 2013 at 20:02 #

    If women were in charge of polygamy it wouldn’t last a year. That would be the straw that broke the camel’s back.

    It’s bad enough that when women dominate something, they always destroy it. Education, for example. But since the family is the foundation of every civilization, if they made the laws for polygamy, it’s finally over.

    And again, there would not be any reason whatsoever for “betas” to not kill “alphas,” although those terms are nonsense.

    They refer to the Alpha couple, who were the only couple that bred to limit the number of puppies. Most people don’t know it, but lower-ranking canines can overthrow the Alpha couple.

    Apply that to humans, with their penchant for murder.

    Also think about the fact that tomcats kill kittens. Lions also kill the cubs of another male when they take over.

    With polygamy, there is no reason for hopeless “betas” to not only kill “alphas,” but also their kids. That is, for the evolutionary psychology types who think we are run by nothing but what they misdefine as our biology.

    Like

  58. Mike S April 29, 2013 at 20:22 #

    “assuming (against Mike S’s comment) divorce laws remain consistent, the prospect of potentially 2 or 3 times the alimony and child support would likely put most men off a polygamous marriage.”

    I believe polygamy would cause the current divorce paradigm to be replaced. It is only a few generations old, and its assumptions couldn’t deal with dividing assets when there is still an intact family with other wives and children to take into consideration. The best interest of the child would be to leave it with its other brothers, sisters, and mothers and not damage the family’s standard of living by forcing it to support the departing wife. More likely there would be a contract that stipulates what she gets if she leaves and who keeps the kids. She may be able to get her dowry back if her parents provided one, but there would also be women who came with no dowry. And it is likely that we won’t have dowries again, nor bride prices and concubines. At least not in the first iteration of poly.

    However, some women would come into marriages with assets, inheritances, savings, property, and vehicles. I can see a court compensating them for that, but the marriage contract likely would contain language covering specific assets.

    Like

  59. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 20:37 #

    Mike, you’re being far too logical about this.

    I might agree with your scenario if I actually thought that polygamy would become widespread. I don’t. And I believe it will be feminists who will resist changes in the law to legalize polygamy. But even assuming it becomes legal, divorce laws would be slow to catch up. But the chaos could be fun to watch whilst sipping a frosty cocktail poolside.

    In the example you gave, I image one wife wanting out of a plural marriage who tried to sue for alimony and/or child support would be torn to pieces by the remaining wives, perhaps literally…

    Like

  60. LostSailor April 29, 2013 at 20:43 #

    EP can help examine and explain certain fundamental behaviors and characteristics, but it’s a mistake to take it too far. We are no longer base animals or pre-verbal hunter-gatherers roaming the Savannah. Sure, in a poor society with polygamy where the luckless betas are so marginalized, it’s not unimaginable that they would turn to crime and murder.

    But in a Western society, such men will have other options, not to mention a well-developed police state to keep them in line.

    If it ever actually come to pass, I think that feminists would so rig the game in their favor that only an idiot would agree to a polygamous marriage.

    Like

  61. X Y Zed April 29, 2013 at 20:46 #

    Well, open marriage is gaining traction.

    Like

  62. mumtaz April 29, 2013 at 21:27 #

    some women are of negative value , not just zero

    Like

  63. mumtaz April 29, 2013 at 21:48 #

    JB single motherhood doesn’t necessary mean poverty

    here in UK single mom with 2 kids can scrounge some 400-500 quid in benefits ,per week
    (600-1000USD I think)
    that’s twice as much as minimum wage job

    they don’t exactly need a husband to help with bills, 15million taxpaying men already do that

    they may have use for a man as entertainment , as for fatherhood , many women seem not to grasp such abstract concept

    Like

  64. Brigadon April 29, 2013 at 21:56 #

    I can barely stand to be around one entitled bitch at a time. Why on earth would I want to try and support more than one?
    Polygamy would be wonderful for lawyers…. each woman gets half. I wonder if they will start selling body parts in order to make up the difference.

    Like

  65. Liz April 30, 2013 at 00:11 #

    Not really. It’s gaining advertisement with the advent of the world wide web…but not traction or popularity. To whose advantage is open marriage? What’s the point of being married if you’re going to screw other people?

    Like

  66. Bob Wallace April 30, 2013 at 00:52 #

    “I image one wife wanting out of a plural marriage who tried to sue for alimony and/or child support would be torn to pieces by the remaining wives, perhaps literally…”

    This is exactly what I predicted. If a wife tried to leave and take assets and kids with her, the other women would not allow it. Take money from OUR kids!?!? How DARE the bitch even try it! We’ll take care of her!

    Like

  67. Z April 30, 2013 at 01:06 #

    Well, Mr. Z is an alpha whether you think he is or not. I don’t really care if every other woman wanted him and some women still hold out the hope we’ll split so they can be with him. I didn’t want him because he was “alpha”. He wanted ME. He asked me out. I said yes. Simple as that.

    Maybe it’s because Mr. Z sowed a LOT of wild oats before he met me, but really, he doesn’t want to run around and ‘spread his seed’ at this point in his life. Seriously, not every man is some cut out cardboard non-person who just fulfills some weird list of “what all men (or alphas) are” in your head.

    All women also supposedly want babies… not me. So yeah really… not everybody fits exact molds. Human beings are unique.

    I will never cheat on Mr. Z. Seriously, I don’t know where you get this stuff. Hypergamy or no, I can control myself and LOVE my husband. I know, you probably don’t believe that either.

    Biology or no biology, humans are the animal who can reason and rise above random base urges for greater long term happiness.

    I DIDN’T tell you how “alpha males” think. I am really unclear on why reading comprehension is so difficult. I said you cannot say ALL alphas do or say or think anything because the second you put someone into a “box” and they MUST conform because you say so, they are not alpha. I’m not sure what’s hard about that. You seem to think there doesn’t exist a single alpha male who would willingly commit to a woman he loves without cheating on her. SELF control is the greatest control. I have a hard time respecting a man who can’t even control himself. I also have a hard time seeing that as “alpha”, but if others do and that is what they are into, alrighty then.

    I’m not a feminist, but… honestly if you have such disdain for me, let’s just not interact anymore. I don’t know what I did to tweak you but holy crap.

    Like

  68. Z April 30, 2013 at 01:09 #

    No, there are alpha females. You’re right. And many of them can hold onto an alpha male. And while we’re at it… all this “alpha male” stuff is more a metaphor than a real scientific THING. The whole alpha male concept comes from wolf packs, but our original assumptions about wolf packs turned out to be wrong. Most wolf packs are not constant fighting for hierarchy, most are an alpha male and female who are the PARENTS of offspring who are the rest of the pack.

    So our entire “alpha male” concept comes from a wrong understanding of wolf packs. I’m not saying humans don’t have social hierarchies, we do. We also have varying degrees of dominance in both males and females. But, an “alpha male” in one social situation is not guaranteed to be the top dog in another one. There is always “someone more alpha”, but at the super extremes you’re really dealing more with narcissism and abuse, which… how many ladies want to sign up for that nonsense? Show of hands? No? Didn’t think so.

    Like

  69. Z April 30, 2013 at 01:15 #

    This, exactly this. And all I was saying is… “not every alpha male is a cheater” or even “wants” to cheat. Really. Some alpha males do want a monogamous relationship with a woman they love. (Though this may be uncommon in alpha types. I don’t know, I didn’t take a poll.)

    Also, PLENTY of betas cheat.

    My definition of alpha would be the person with the most social power in any given social hierarchy. So it will vary. An alpha male may not be THE alpha in every social hierarchy he’s ever in, because logically there are always people more dominant somewhere on the planet and one alpha guy may run into said person.

    Like

  70. Z April 30, 2013 at 01:21 #

    So, then is it your assertion that an alpha male cannot be noble? It’s an impossibility?

    Wow, way to insult a whole lot of men who happen to have some power but also don’t feel the need to cheat.

    Incidentally, early on, I told Mr. Z that I would rather share him than lose him. He knows I am not going to flip out and go psycho on him if for some reason just being with me in bed isn’t enough for him, but there is a HUGE difference in that and being a dishonest cad who can’t keep it in his pants and honor vows he made.

    There is no law that says a man alpha or not must marry. But when you make commitments and promises and you cannot honor them with the lameass excuse that it is because you are an “alpha”, wow. Just wow.

    I don’t consider that very powerful. A man who can’t control the activities of his own penis? Um yeah.

    Like

  71. Z April 30, 2013 at 02:04 #

    That’s awesome! I think respect and consideration and thoughtfulness to each other are the keys to long term happiness. I don’t understand why someone picks someone as “the one” they are committing their life to, but then isn’t committed to nurturing that relationship.

    Like

  72. Z April 30, 2013 at 02:07 #

    Agreed. At a certain age, your character starts to show on your face. It’s what makes the difference in being beautiful for your age and not. IMO.

    Like

  73. Z April 30, 2013 at 02:10 #

    Agreed. Have you ever seen the movie: “This is 40?” It’s a sort of disgusting film that showcases these not-so-appealing female qualities that feminism has been pushing on us for the past several decades.

    The mom/wife/female lead in the movie swears she’s 38 (even though she’s 40), because “I can’t be 40! If I’m 40, it means I have to shop at Ann Taylor.”

    First of all, Ann Taylor is classy and classic. I am suspicious of any women who wouldn’t want to be classy and classic. Because being 40 and dressing like a 20-yr-old at a rave isn’t pathetic at all. /sarcasm.

    But, JB, quick poundings are LIBERATION!!!

    Like

  74. Z April 30, 2013 at 02:17 #

    HA! That’s a good point. The thing though, is, people like to talk in generalities as if “all people” will do xyz or “everybody” will think a certain way. It’s just not how humanity works. All you really need is ONE person who shares your values and likes you and can love you. That’s IT. It really doesn’t matter what the greater culture does. Not everybody would be on board for a polygamous culture anymore than everybody is on board for “hook up culture”. There are always pockets of sane people who just go their own way and do their own thing.

    Luckily there are 7 billion people on this planet and you only need to find one in the correct demographic that isn’t a complete asshat.

    Like

  75. Z April 30, 2013 at 02:21 #

    I think the problem with open marriage is that it really is no more stable than no marriage at all.

    Like

  76. Mik April 30, 2013 at 06:12 #

    JB is essentially saying what Islam has been saying since it first came about. There are a lot of reasons as to why Polygamy is good, but the main ones being, there are more women than men, Polygamy solves that. JB’s main point is another, not all men are willing to marry a single mum, but as a second wife, yes. Also the issue of the kids not having a daddy is solved.

    I have a friend who’s dad is rich. He’s got three wives and a huge house. Each wife and her kids get their own floor each. They’re probably the happiest family i know.

    This sort of Polygamy is also fairl common in Russia, Eastern Europe and some parts of South-East Asia.

    From what i’ve seen, a lot of women are actually fine with being the 2nd or 3rd wife so on. The difficulty is convincing your first wife that you’d like to marry another.

    Like

  77. Mik April 30, 2013 at 06:16 #

    One more question JB. Would YOU be ok of Mr JB decided to take on another wife? And if he did, what would your terms be?

    Like

  78. Nergal April 30, 2013 at 10:06 #

    “I’m a goddamn genius, I tell you.”

    “You forgot something.”

    V Yes,you did. V

    “Polygamy means that only about 20% of men are actually marriage material.”

    Hey, you forgot something too!

    How are the 20% of us with wives going to be able to have time to go to work, have sex with all or most of our wives,update our status on Facebook,keep up on our appearances and still have time for the fellas when they want to go get a beer?

    WAAAAAAAAAAH,IT’S TOO HARDDDD!!!

    LIFE IS OPPRESSING MEEEEEEEEE! WAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

    Like

  79. Nergal April 30, 2013 at 10:25 #

    I don’t think very many men at all will “become gay”. If it gets to that point, I imagine we’ll “build a better woman” like we usually do when something that used to work no longer does. I see sexbots probably being offered first, but being the owner of one would probably carry a stigma that’d be hard to wash off. By 2050, we might be looking at our very own sexclones.

    It’s possible to demasculinize women in the womb with certain hormones, and even though clones necessarily suffer from genetic frailties and live probably a third as long as real mammals,that won’t be much of an impediment to someone who’s only interested in having a flesh and blood sexual partner.

    With the technology and genomic research we have today, we could make women who were the epitome of femininity and who would be hot to trot,thanks to knowledge of their 20-25 year lifespan.

    Now,I know some people are reading this and interpreting “sex slave” from what I’m saying,but that wouldn’t necessarily be the case. It would be more like importing immigrants to “do the jobs [today’s women] won’t do”,the way I envision it .

    If it ever gets bad enough that straight men would be considering gay sex as an option,something of the nature of sexbots and sexclones will at least be floated, and more likely than not, actually implemented. Rather than turn to gay sex, men will probably opt to replace women with something better.

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  80. S.C.O.R.C.H.™ (@_Scorch_) April 30, 2013 at 11:36 #

    But. Even though I love watching Sister Wives, I can’t imagine being in that situation. People always seem to focus on the sex for men, but trying to satisfy all of those women emotionally?
    ……Good luck with that.

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  81. Liz April 30, 2013 at 14:06 #

    I’ve never known a “true alpha” man in the real world to claim he knows what each and every true alpha man does. Nor does a genius usually brag about being smart or claim they know what all geniuses do, or the affluent brag about being rich or claim to know how all rich people live. It’s the internet. ‘Nuff said.

    A man is going to try to find the woman (or women, whatever) of highest possible value that he can get. A valuable man will be able to obtain women of higher value. The highest value women aren’t going to screw around, and he doesn’t want them to screw around, but that usually comes with a price. It’s all cost to gains. I don’t (and won’t) share. I have exclusivity, he has exclusivity. Neither of us has to worry that the other is screwing around. If I caught him in a big lie, depending on the circumstances, his stock would fall in my esteem. It would be the same for him if the roles were reversed (though he is an insanely jealous person when it comes to me, far more so than I am with him…obviously women are going to want him. I think there’s something wrong with them if they don’t).

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  82. Joe April 30, 2013 at 15:36 #

    That’s okay. According to a survey done by OK Cupid, 80% of us males are “below average”.

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  83. Z April 30, 2013 at 19:56 #

    Good point, Liz. Most alpha males I’ve met give you a funny look when you start talking about “alpha males” to begin with because they just don’t self-reference that way. It’s weird. LMAO @ “it’s the internet. nuff said.”

    In reality I’m probably a bit more “poly-wired” than Mr. Z is, but I don’t act on it because I love Mr. Z. I’m sure he’s had fleeting attractions to other women, I’m not some moron. But… likewise I know he loves me and is honest and noble and committed to us. He knows if he needed “more” as in some kind of sexual partner variety that that is a discussion we can have that I wouldn’t just flip out about. I’d give him anything he needed so long as it would not put me in unnecessary/stupid danger.

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  84. Z May 1, 2013 at 05:52 #

    It doesn’t happen. This is an imaginary scenario concocted by men who believe women hit a “wall” where they are totally unappealing to all male human beings unless the man is old and has poor eyesight. To me that just indicates the men one wants to steer clear of when it comes to mating. All women age. (and men, too.) It’s a fact of life. if a 35 year old woman makes you wake up in a cold sweat, you probably aren’t a guy most women would feel safe with long term.

    I think there is a subset of the male population who will screw around with women in their early twenties up until the very last possible second when women in their twenties start thinking they are creepy old dudes. Guys who have a lot of money and power can continue to bed women in their early twenties, and that’s their business. If you’ve got currency to trade, trade it.

    But, at some point, most men decide they want to love and be loved. I understand it is slim pickings now when it comes to “women who can and will treat a man right” who hasn’t been completely tainted by feminism, but it’s not like every single male in existence is some great prize either. It seems slim pickings on both sides of the fence sometimes. I wonder if the guys who seem to think only ageless women are worthy of them understand they are like the flipside of feminism to most women. i.e. no prize and not the man any of us wants to end up with, lest we be “traded” for a newer model.

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  85. Z May 1, 2013 at 05:54 #

    Good point.

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  86. Luke May 1, 2013 at 09:31 #

    Polygamy on any kind of scale is absolutely incompatible with modern civilzation. It’s a system where a few men get essentially all the women, leaving most men with zip — not just no prospects for sex, but no chance of having children. Instead of the latter (beta) men being productive and peaceful, they have every incentive to violently overthrow the men in charge. The alphas meanwhile spend THEIR time and energy watching/enslaving the betas, and mate-guarding their harems. This is why the GNP of the >800 million population Arab world is only (if you take out the chance deposits of petroleum) less than that of Belgium.
    Again, if you want peaceful, prosperous, modern civilization (think reliable electricity, safe running water, plenty of food, modern doctors and dentists), you should oppose the introduction of polygamy as being even more dangerous to those than is the welfare state.

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  87. Luke May 1, 2013 at 09:47 #

    A fairly well-done, amusingly in-your-face summary of why a man looking for a woman to date should skip single/divorced mothers:

    http://necolebitchie.com/2008/01/07/13-reasons-to-avoid-dating-single-mothers/

    Like

  88. Z May 1, 2013 at 22:54 #

    HA! I read this the other day. It’s sadly pretty true.

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  89. gallanr May 3, 2013 at 13:42 #

    Feminists are aiming for a polygamous culture in their quest for as much alpha male dick as possible, BUT their goal will crash and burn mainly due to contraception. Quite simply feminist scum refuse to have many kids. This will mean thier perverted idealogy will not be passed to the next generation. Leaving the stronger beta’s with large families to shape the future. The alpha male spawn revolution will also fail cause of contraception.

    This is good overall for our culture I think. As to survive in this harsh climate beta’s will be forced to become more alpha to keep their women inline. Thus preventing a future slave state from happening.

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  90. Bob Wallace May 7, 2013 at 13:57 #

    One thing I completely forgot to mention about why polygamy is such a bad thing is that when one man can monopolize many women is that ultimately some of the remaining men will turn to sex with teenage or pre-teen boys. This is widespread in the Islamic world, where are basically no women at all.

    This is the main reason why there will be no polygamy in the United States.

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