Did I ever tell you the one about Beyonce and the traktor?

18 Jun

Dear gentle readers,

Looks like a traktor has hit a lori full of beer down a long dusty road in the middle of nowhere,

and the driver was listening to Beyonce and so JB is now stuck without  W-Fi access.

Which on a scale of  zero to Beyonce, is a full on bag of Beyonce.


She may be around later….JB that is…

In the meantime,

Why not check out this oldie but goodie from earlier on in the year…


12 Responses to “Did I ever tell you the one about Beyonce and the traktor?”

  1. LostSailor June 18, 2013 at 19:15 #

    What the hell was Lori, obviously drunk off her ass, doing wandering in the middle of nowhere listening to Dusty Rhodes? (His one album sucked anyway.) I warned her about that, and now she’s taken out a traktor, which was apparently delivering JB’s Wi-Fi. Lori has a lot to answer for.

    And I’m not sure I really want a full bag of Beyonce. Can I just get a couple of ounces and get back to you later? (Lori may need some when she wakes up; that hangover is gonna be a killer!)


  2. judgybitch June 18, 2013 at 20:46 #

    Stupid router. I have no idea what got into my wi-fi’s mind, but’s it’s been beaten back into operative submission.

    Speaking of beating, we’ll be talking about Nigella Lawson tomorrow.

    It’s gonna be fun!


  3. Radical Suburbanite June 18, 2013 at 21:21 #

    I just saw that story yesterday and the first thing I thought was I wonder what JB would have to say about that? Can’t wait!


  4. Marlo Rocci June 18, 2013 at 21:48 #

    And now my server is down and I have to wait until I get home to restart it. Stupid server.


  5. Marlo Rocci June 18, 2013 at 21:50 #

    Damn, it’s that damn netgear router comcast gave me again. Have to reboot it.


  6. judgybitch June 18, 2013 at 23:09 #

    I had to recollimate the electrostatic field stabilizer matrix. Any significant misalignment deionizes the secondary throttle module’s intercooling filter, setting up a recurring inverse feedback loop that threw off my field inducer by more than just 42 millicochranes.

    What a pain!


  7. Ter June 19, 2013 at 01:00 #

    An ‘accident’ you say – hmmmm, considering this has been classified as a hate-site, I’m not so sure…


  8. Keen Observer June 19, 2013 at 02:37 #

    You obviously need to get hold of LCDR Data’s phase discriminator…those millicochrane-level field adjustments are a stone bitch.


  9. Alex June 19, 2013 at 02:48 #

    i’m not sure if tht’s bullshit that looks factual or not and am not sure i would be able to find a starting place to find out


  10. Spaniard June 19, 2013 at 10:41 #

    I wonder if Cameron Diaz will regret when she is 50. I do not think so.
    Jaquelinne Bisset never did it.

    “To extend your face, your talents, your….” Maybe some people we do not think we are so fantabulous to have a “mini me” and extend our DNA. In my case, I would be horrified of a replica of mine walking on Earth. No, dear! No way! Humankind does not deserve such a thing.

    Anyway… I agree that 90% of women NEED chidren. But men do not. In any case men, we can wait until they 60 or even more. My countryman, Picasso, had a son with 90 years old. My other countryman, Dr. Iglesias (father of Julio Iglesias) had a son with 93 years old (it seems the father was so stud as the son and the grandson, Enrique. It something about the genetics of the family)


  11. feeriker June 19, 2013 at 17:35 #

    Looks like a traktor has hit a lori full of beer down a long dusty road in the middle of nowhere,

    I hope it wasn’t a lori (or do you mean “lorry”?) full of REAL beer. If it was, I hope someone was quickly on the scene with a ShopVac, some straws, and a kegerator. Multiple layers of cheesecloth will strain the dirt out of the spilled beer that had contact with the ground and will ensure continued drinkability.

    Oh, and I don’t even want to know how such an accident could affect broadband service …


  12. Spaniard June 20, 2013 at 12:16 #

    At least, this childfree women do not take child support from any man.

    Besides, having children for not being alone when you are elderly, it is the most selfish thing.


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