I stumbled across this website a few days ago, and I was both repulsed and fascinated by it. It’s called Earn The Necklace, with the tagline Young Women….Rich, Older Men….Juicy Confessions.
This column in particular caught my attention: How to Get What You Want Without Giving Him What He Wants
And yes, it’s just what you imagine. It’s advice for “Sugar Babies” on how to wheedle out the cash and gifts, all the while avoiding having sex with the generous “Sugar Daddy”. The ladies are not in these relationships for the emotional or intellectual benefits an older man brings. Nope.
Why do we do it? Because wealthy older men provide us with the most important thing: freedom! They provide their sugar babies with a steady source of income. They’re generous, supportive, and respect our boundaries. He isn’t invasive and doesn’t ask too many questions. Deep down, he just wants to know that you are in love with him. And for the most part, he’s careful to not rock the boat too much out of fear of upsetting you.
How to get that income, putting out as little as possible? Here’s the advice in a nutshell:
1. Pretend to be busy when you’re not and then call and pretend you’re bored and deliberately frustrate him sexually.
Very mature. But there is method to this madness.
Tell him you’re lying naked on the bed, that you’re bored, you miss him, and you don’t know what to do with yourself. Ask him if he likes phone sex or if he would rather wait until he sees you in person. Before you say good night, tell him about everything you bought while you were out shopping (with his money, of course.) Better yet, describe in detail everything you didn’t buy but wish you had. There’s a good chance he’ll make sure you get it.
2. Start petty arguments so you can pretend to be too pissed off to have sex. Don’t listen to his side of the argument.
Be thorny, not prickly. Make it trivial enough to get you a one– or two-night reprieve, but not so petty that he won’t bother participating in the argument. And catch him off guard—sit casually in a chair while watching TV, look over at him, and lob a beef you’ve been holding back on. Then stand up, with your hands on your hips, and leave the room. Since you only really care about the one side to the story, you don’t need to sit around waiting for his rebuttal. Tell him that it is what it is, and that you need some time alone to think. That will really help drive the point home and if he’s smart, he’ll know to leave you alone for a while.
3. Pretend you have some sort of medical issue involving your lady bits and use that as an excuse to avoid sex.
Most sugar daddies have already suffered through a long-term relationship or two, and they don’t want to make waves. He especially won’t want to talk about your female body issues. Unless your sugar daddy is a physician, there are a large number of unquestionable female issues that can save the day.
4. Get him really excited over the course of the day, order take-out and then tell him there’s only time for a quickie. It’ll be over in a flash.
Set the mood at dinner. When you hear the turning of the lock, greet him at the door wearing an apron over his favorite piece of lingerie. Tell him you want to work up an appetite before dinner, but you ordered delivery so he’ll have to try and be quick. Rest your elbows on the kitchen table, look demurely over your shoulder at him, and call him over. A little wrap around fun and it’ll be over in a flash.
5. Bore him to death with a really long night of movies
After a long day at the office and four, five, or six hours of watching The Godfather, he’ll be ready to call it a night—he may even fall asleep on the couch. “It’s OK,” you tell him, adding, “We can do it tomorrow if you’re up for it.”
You’re probably waiting for the joke to kick in, right? What new madness is this? It’s not a joke. Earn the Necklace has a US Alexa Ranking of 33 254, meaning it’s a rather popular site.
http://www.alexa.com/siteinfo/earnthenecklace.com
This shit really happens.
And Miami seems to be a hotspot for sugar baby/daddy relationships. Jezebel cottoned on to this, and my goodness, did they ever work hard to spin the ladies as poor exploited victims of predatory men.
http://jezebel.com/expose-on-miamis-sugar-baby-culture-is-most-depressi-577527455
Are you a young woman who likes money or an old man with money who likes young women and would like to use aforementioned money to perhaps buy a young woman? If so, you may be profiled in a recently published piece that combines two of the least fun subjects in the world: the concept of sugar babies — young women who hook up with rich old dudes so the old dudes buy them crap, often at great risk to themselves and their own well-being— and Miami, Florida.
Hahahahahahah! No silly, they don’t really GET terrible diseases of the ladyparts, they just pretend to, so they can get all that shit without having to pay for it. I mean, that has to be the “great risk” Jez is talking about, isn’t it?
Maybe I’m missing something. Somebody clue me in as to how having a rich, older boyfriend pay all your bills puts the WOMAN at risk? Is there a danger she might accidentally suffocate under the bag of cash her Sugar Daddy provides her?
What really sucks about sugar baby relationships is that most of the arrangements don’t seem like they’re entered into freely; they’re a desperate response to a shitty set of circumstances — a lack of job opportunities, lack of job abilities, and last, but not least, the insanely high cost of college education.
Oh, poor wittle duckies. No job skills (whose fault is that) and the high cost of education (boo hoo). And no job opportunities in Miami. Let’s see. Monster.com says there are 1000’s of jobs in Miami, right at this very moment.
http://jobsearch.monster.com/search/?where=Miami__2C-FL
Oh, but those jobs are sucky. You have to show up at inconvenient times and actually work. Sugar Babies get paid to look nice and have sex, and there aren’t a whole lot of jobs out there with those requirements.
Oh, wait. Yes there are. It’s called prostitution. Uh-oh. Cue the feminist histrionics! Ladies, you can be anything you want to be. Except a stay at home mother. Or a hooker.
In short, young women in south Florida are turning to what basically amounts to internet prostitution with expensive cocktails for the same reason that Walter White started cooking meth on Breaking Bad: because America is untenably, depressingly fucked up.
Really, when you consider the blatant exploitation of MEN that goes on these relationships, it’s rather curious that feminists don’t stand up to applaud Sugar Babies. You go girl! Get that money! He’s only rich because patriarchy anyways!
And some Sugar Babies are in it for serious cash.
Chanel wants $20 000/month. Jesus. Her college must charge a lot of tuition.
http://www.seekingarrangement.com/detail.php?id=1067831
Whitney will settle for just $10 000/month. Well, she’s young. Her value might go up when she gets a little experience?
http://www.seekingarrangement.com/detail.php?id=610688
Oh, now, there I think the problem lies. No, Whitney’s value won’t go UP over time, it will go down. Sexual economics. Men will pay for beauty and sex, and a straightforward cash transaction comes with benefits. Mostly, the ability to avoid long-term financial obligations and a way to control Lady Drama. The Sugar Babies understand this well. Pick a fight, but keep it trivial. There is only so much bullshit your rich boyfriend is willing to tolerate.
Okay, I just did a Google search to confirm that men have not (as of yet) been held financially liable for their mistresses, and I came across this: it turns out that the Wife can sue the Other Woman under Alienation of Affection laws, which are in effect in seven US states.
Cynthia Shakelford was awarded $9million when she took her husband’s mistress to court!
Holy crap! That’s quite an award. The senior ladies take infidelity pretty seriously, now don’t they?
Let’s Google Shakelford and Jezebel. Here we are:
http://jezebel.com/5499991/lay-off-married-men-jilted-wife-successfully-sues-mistress
What happened to Shackelford is horrible, and she probably is in shock and isn’t thinking clearly. But just because she thinks the marriage was “great” doesn’t make it so — it just means her husband was a really good liar. Sleeping with a man you know is married is a shitty thing to do, but someone needs to explain to Shackelford that her husband, not his mistress, is the one who broke a vow to be faithful.
Hmm. Curious. So Jezebel does NOT support the right of young, attractive women to capitalize on their sexual appeal in whatever ways they deem appropriate, but neither do they support the rights of older women to go after these HomeWreckers.
Why? Because in the first scenario, men get some benefits that only young attractive women can provide. Sugar Babies skew the competitive landscape, and that makes the older ladies who wasted their most attractive years studying Comparative Women’s Literature and refusing to shave a wee bit tiffed.
http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2011/02/sex_is_cheap.html
Ladies haven’t lost their lust for men who can provide for them. Not in the least.
But they have lost the ability to attract those breadwinning men, because they forgot that men don’t give away their cash for nothing: they want beauty and love and youth and children in exchange.
The hour-glass figure, signalling fertility and reproductive health appeals to men universally.
Sugar Babies are a new generation of women, raised to believe they have complete autonomy over their own bodies and sexuality, in a capitalist economy, learning to connect the dots. The vocal opposition from feminists comes down to one thing: sour fucking grapes.
They can’t compete. And the suggestion that men’s desires and natural inclinations are perfectly acceptable and manageable further pisses them off. Real men love PEOPLE, not bodies.
Well, yes. Real men DO love people, but those people come in bodies, and some of those bodies are more appealing than others. All the screaming in the world isn’t going to change that, and young women, who are far from stupid, see that when the supply is tightened, the demand goes up.
And so does the price.
The payout for being The Other Woman can be very high indeed. Given the loathing that feminism demonstrates for the two women they hate the most in the world, housewives and hookers, one would think the feminist ladies would love to see the Pretty Young Things get their comeuppance.
But that is in conflict with the central premise of feminism: women are VICTIMS. When forced to choose, they cling to the Victim Mentality, and blame MEN, and only men, for infidelity. The wife is obviously a victim because CHEATING BASTARD, but the mistress is a victim too because EXPLOITATION.
It’s a pretty impressive little hamster dance, isn’t it?
Earn the Necklace paints a very different picture. The only thing these women are victims of is avarice and laziness. Sugar Daddies know what they are getting, and they are not victimized in any way, but neither are the Sugar Babies. They know how to exploit their own value, and how to maximize their incomes. They are strategic in extracting maximum payouts for minimal inputs. They take their careers very seriously, and invest heavily in themselves. It’s almost like they “Lean In”, no?
What Sugar Babies do is challenge the notion that women are perpetually exploited children incapable of making rational decisions about their own sexuality and bodies. What if we framed the abortion debate in the same terms as we frame prostitution? Poor ladies exploited by murderous abortionists, unable to make rational decisions about their own bodies and sexuality.
Yeah, no.
And what Sugar Babies do more than anything else is validate the Sugar Daddies. Male sexuality is a powerful force, not to be contained and dampened, but to be exploited. Obviously, there is a very dark undercurrent running along that assertion, but the Sugar Baby/Sugar Daddy relationship puts men’s desires front and center, alongside women’s.
Bruce Willis. Yes, please!
If there is exploitation going on in these partnerships (and from the sentiments on Earn the Necklace, there most certainly IS exploitation), one thing is certain: it goes both ways.
There’s a word for that: Equality.
I personally have no problem with these transactional relationships. I assume both the men and the women involved understand the deal and consider the benefits to outweigh the costs. What business is it of mine? The existence of Sugar Babies just ensures that I keep myself as competitive as possible.
Dara Torres was 45 when she bid for a spot on the Olympic Swim Team.
http://olympics.time.com/2012/06/27/dara-torres-oldest-olympic-hopeful-at-swim-trials/
She came fourth, against her much, much younger competitors, and missed out on her sixth Olympiad.
She may have missed the cut by one place, but hot damn!
She’s still on her game. I wonder how much she could get per month? It’s not like she would be the first Olympian to escort on the side.
Suzie’s no spring chicken, either, but she still plays by the rules of the game.
Men like beauty. They always have and always will. And they will pay for it. Some will pay with a lifetime of labor and loyalty, like my husband. And some will pay $50 000/month.
Well, for Chanel’s sake, and all the other Sugar Babies out there, I hope so.
College has never been more expensive!
Lots of love,
JB
judgybitch 
Funny but I’ve actually dated a bunch of these girls in the past and they would tell me the same stories on how they have all these sugar daddies who take care of them… You may be surprised but most women have had or do have a guy in their life who is doing or has done just this for them. It’s rare that I meet a woman who hasn’t had or who wouldn’t like a sugar daddy.
In a strange way, I actually respected them for being the way they were… After all, nobody was forcing these guys to spend all their money on these girls. They were doing it completely on their own and knew exactly what they were getting into…
Not to throw some wood on the fire but the tactics that these women use aren’t that much different from what the average woman does with her man. It’s always some sort of trade off to one extent or another. Classic cat and mouse.
I teach guys how to be more attractive and pick-up women. We use some tactics and certain mentalities to achieve a certain level of success… To me, women have learned and will continue to learn(like the ones above) to get what they want.
Nice post either way….
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The world is full of gorgeous mature woman like Dara. Who the hell wants to go after the young girls? Young wine is good sometimes but you cannot comapare it with a good old Rioja.
Judgybitch, there is a third possibility: no need to pay with a lifetime, like a good hubby, no need to pay a lot of cash and expensive presents monthly, like a good sugardaddy… just paying puntually 100-200 euro, for a while, like a good john. And you have variety and you save a lot of money. Today I feel like shagging a blonde mature woman like Dara, tomorrow, probably I will feel like shaggin a 21 year old brunnette, the day after tomorrow… who knows?
I love how much feminists, complain about the johns!!!! “Slob, scum, lower side of life, loser, creep, exploiter, male chauvinist pig, you ar so worthless that you have to pay, etc, etc”
I laugh to death. Thanks God for the professionals.
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And they’re just as thankful for you, I’m sure!
Do you miss female companionship though? Just the day to day banter and in jokes and camaraderie?
I would miss that so much if I wasn’t married. I grew up around boys and men and their company just feels… like home.
My husband’s presence makes the house feel like a home.
Even when he’s annoying me.
God knows I never annoy him!
Well, not more than once every couple of minutes.
😛
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“…are not that much diferent from waht the average woman does with her man”.
Spot on.
LOL.
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Interesting topic as always JB. It’s funny I was just having almost this same discussion last night with my current +1. I have a buddy in his mid 50’s who has been divorced (no kids) for about 4 years now. He has decided to start dating again but seems to want to find this unicorn of a woman who is in her mid 20s, 8 or higher on the physical beauty side of the game but not a “gold digger”.
He makes good money but isn’t a titan of industry or anything. Certainly not in the pay $10,000 a month for a sugar baby range. Anyway, I was discussing this with the woman I’m dating just to get her view point. She has an high level of common sense, I have found, and she didn’t disappoint here.
Her view point was that in his case he can’t expect a mid 20’s hottie to be interested in him with out also expecting that part of that reason is the financial and social standing he would provide. Her words were along the line of “why would a woman of that nature give up dating a younger, more physically prime guy for him unless it was for the financial stability he can provide.”
Sugar baby/Sugar Daddy just kinda formalizes the transaction men and woman have been making since the first cave-man brought home a side of mammoth for dinner.
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Yes, Judgybitch, sometimes I miss the good companionship of a woman, because, thanks God, I have known in this life women who made me feel like home, like you say. I know that kind of women exist.
But, you cannot make that an absolut. There is a kind of “absolutation” of the relationship. And I think it is feminist propaganda again. Romantic pornography targeted TO MEN.
So, a lot o men are longing constantly for a relationship and making themselves very unhappy because of that.
If it happens… great. If does not… no problem.
Dogs are the friends of men. Probably cats are the best friends of women.
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You’re probably waiting for the joke to kick in, right? What new madness is this? It’s not a joke. Earn the Necklace has a US Alexa Ranking of 33 254, meaning it’s a rather popular site.
http://www.alexa.com/siteinfo/earnthenecklace.com
This shit really happens.
Oh yes, it happens all the time. Always has an probably always will. I do wonder, however, if any of these clever little bitches ever pause to wonder just how long their “secret” will remain such (assuming that it’s even a secret at all). Most older men aren’t as stupid as they’d like to believe, even when their finely aged testosterone reservoir has gotten the better of their judgment. One hopes that these women are prepared to get kicked to the curb in very short order (serially) once Sugar Daddy realizes that he’s getting played – and it doesn’t usually take him very long to realize when what’s happening.
OTOH, I honestly can’t say that I’ve ever had a lot of sympathy for older guys who get burned by younger pussy. Most of them HAVE to know the risk they’re taking by hooking up with such, notwithstanding the fact that there’s a widespread “more-dollars-then-sense” demographic out there. Maybe I trust too much in (the grossly misnamed) “common” sense, but it seems to me that playing Sugar Daddy is just begging for trouble.
But then again, to each his own blend of poison. Whatever stokes your furnace. Just be prepared to live with the consequences of indulging.
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Chances are the Sugar Daddies are being heavily exploited, with a setup like that. I mean just a quickie because of a delivery order? Only if you’re there to be write candy/make co-workers jealous, otherwise put out. It’s a better idea for friends with benefits to prevent strings.
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I think it’s hilarious that these women think they can sexually starve their Sugar Daddies and get away with it. Don’t they realize that the SDs are wise to their tricks? And don’t they realize that the SDs can cancel their credit cards with a phone call?
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“Why do we do it? Because wealthy older men provide us with the most important thing: freedom!”
replace women with plantation owners and wealthy older men with young blacks. this is no different.
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Yes men, and women love beauty and the curves of a woman have been cherished for thousands of years as many ancient artifacts have reflected. What man would not want to shag a supple younger woman when his wife is spilling out of her sweat pants and has a case of bitter bitch face that would rival Jessica Valenti’s? But these days beauty not only comes with a price but also with great risk. All one of these little sugar babies with her store bought sweater bagels has to do is get her G-string in a twist or a slight case of butt hurt and file a false rape allegation and destroy her sugar daddy’s life. In the feminist monopolized courts he will be stigmatized as a “dirty old bastard” vs. the other side of the coin “poor neglected wife” in the forty something and her 17 year old lover cougar and cub circles. I was reading an article last night of a female teacher having an affair with a student and only got 90 days of jail time. In that same article a 17 year old football player received 10 years for oral sex with a 15 year old, which according to the article, she was playing her tune on several skin flutes that night. Equality…nope.
IMHO, false rape allegations should be a sex crime. When a male is found innocent the female accuser should do jail time, pay restitution to the legal system as well as the man she falsely accused, and register as a sex offender. If she can’t pay then tack on more jail time (isn’t that how child support & alimony work?)Then maybe the game of ass will have a more level playing field…
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Geez. Of course there are few job opportunities for young women lacking job “abilities.” (Do they add extra dumb to the water supply at Jezzie-belle?)
In short, young women in south Florida are turning to what basically amounts to internet prostitution with expensive cocktails for the same reason that Walter White started cooking meth on Breaking Bad:
Because the young women had made poor career choices and had shitty jobs as high school chemistry teachers and then got cancer?
So Jezebel does NOT support the right of young, attractive women to capitalize on their sexual appeal in whatever ways they deem appropriate, but neither do they support the rights of older women to go after these HomeWreckers…. Why?
And again you nailed it JB (not that this is rocket science). Because feminism at its root is a Victimology: women are always the victims and can never be blamed for anything. So it’s society’s fault that young Florida women are forced into high-end prostitution and the home-wrecker can’t be blamed because it’s always the man’s fault.
The Earn the Necklace site really should be retitled Earn the Necklace by Perpetrating Outright Fraud.
But the ones I feel sorriest for are the men that have to reduce themselves to these “sugar babies.” $10,000-$20,000 a month for “tuition”? I didn’t realize one could pay for college with expensive shoes, designer duds, and bottle service at trendy nightspots. I understand the attraction of hot young ladies, but, seriously, I agree with Spaniard, I’d suggest just hitting up some of the high-class escort services and save the cash. To put up with the behavior suggested on the “Necklace” site requires a degree of gullibility…
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Yes, because a mutually beneficial transactional relationship between two consenting adults, no matter how lamentable they both are, is exactly the same as violently detaining a man and forcibly making him do your bidding for his entire life.
Good comparison.
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/sarcasm …
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It needs to be noted that some of these men aren’t rejecting marriage, they were kicked out of it. So it’s naturally they go for various levels of prostitute.
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I don’t know…if I were these Sugar Daddies, I’d just go to a high-class prostitute. It seems more honest to me, as opposed to this “I’ll get what I want, but I’ll avoid giving my Sugar Daddy what he wants”. Why put up with even petty fights and boring movie marathons aimed at cockblocking you when another lady will spend the night with you for much less and without drama?
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If women didn’t like money I would have to be a nicer guy. I’ll stick with having a lucrative career.
If I was broke I wouldn’t be able to pull 18-20 year old girls like I can. They just want to get away from mommy and daddy and have nice things. Everyone gets what they want. It’s called a happy relationship.
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I’d have a lot of sex with an old man for $10,000 a month.
I’d probably have more sex than these “sugar babies” are willing to.
If only I didn’t have narrow hips, broad shoulders, a big jaw, a deep voice, a thick brow ridge and a penis.
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I can’t help but wonder why any man would want a person like the “sugarbabbies” described? That’s just bizarre to me. I’d tire of a person like that in about five minutes, no matter what they could do for me…and at 10k a month, it had better be an awful lot.
Necklace seems the equal but opposite rendition of Heartiste’s “be an asshole” advice for men, but to ladies.
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Look up “Financial Domination” and also “Erotic Humiliation”
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JB says: “Do you miss female companionship though?”
JB, companionship with most modern women involves at least a few of the following:
1. She is unintelligent and uncurious about the world around her, except for what she sees on the television.
2. She expects regular payments for the honor of her presence in the form of free entertainment and gifts.
3. The man is expected to be on his “game” 24/7 and is not allowed to express unmanly emotions or feelings. I had a girlfriend who begged me for months to open up emotionally, and then when I did, she told me to stop because it turned her off sexually.
4. The man is expected to be a punching bag and/or emotional tampon she can dump on whenever she feels like.
5. The man is supposed to be a mind reader as to her desires.
6. In any intellectual, athletic, or rhetorical contests he is supposed to let her win, and if she doesn’t she will never admit it and/or hold a grudge.
7. She spends most of your time together glued to her smartphone. This is especially common on the first couple of dates.
8. She is incredibly flaky. Your time and your schedule are meaningless. This usually happens in the first few dates, but I once dated a woman for a few months who did this to me after I had planned an entire evening together & driven 45 minutes to pick her up. I dumped her immediately, and had the joy of getting 10 profanity-laced tirades on my voicemail.
This isn’t a “few bad women.” This is the common experiences that men talk about when dealing with women. Unfortunately, most of these men blame themselves because they haven’t come upon enough red pill knowledge yet and they have been groomed their entire lives to worship women.
JB, in the face of this reality, isn’t it obvious why men are willing to forego “emotional companionship” and focus on casual sex?
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Deep down, he just wants to know that you are in love with him. And for the most part, he’s careful to not rock the boat too much out of fear of upsetting you.
I LOVE this. He wants to know you love him, but he won’t press the issue too much cause he knows he’ll be disappointed if he learns the truth.
How can such dumb men be so rich?
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1. She is unintelligent and uncurious about the world around her, except for what she sees on the television.
So she is vapid, silly, stupid, and uneducated.
2. She expects regular payments for the honor of her presence in the form of free entertainment and gifts.
So she is spoiled rotten.
3. The man is expected to be on his “game” 24/7 and is not allowed to express unmanly emotions or feelings. I had a girlfriend who begged me for months to open up emotionally, and then when I did, she told me to stop because it turned her off sexually.
So she has absolutely no idea what she wants from a man, and expects him to be whatever it is that she wants at that particular time, and nothing else – ie, she doesn’t respect you as a human being that has your own needs, wants, desires, and feelings – you’re just a puppet for her amusement and entertainment.
4. The man is expected to be a punching bag and/or emotional tampon she can dump on whenever she feels like.
See #2 above.
5. The man is supposed to be a mind reader as to her desires.
See #2 above
6. In any intellectual, athletic, or rhetorical contests he is supposed to let her win, and if she doesn’t she will never admit it and/or hold a grudge.
See #2 above
7. She spends most of your time together glued to her smartphone. This is especially common on the first couple of dates.
And rude, to boot…
8. She is incredibly flaky. Your time and your schedule are meaningless. This usually happens in the first few dates, but I once dated a woman for a few months who did this to me after I had planned an entire evening together & driven 45 minutes to pick her up. I dumped her immediately, and had the joy of getting 10 profanity-laced tirades on my voicemail.
See #2 and #7 Sounds like a real catch…
You’ve pretty much summed up the very definition of a woman that I would instruct my sons to avoid like the plague. There are a lot of them out there, but they sure as hell aren’t the “majority” like you seem to claim.
I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again – just like when somebody comes to me complaining about how everybody is mean to them all the time, and my response is “if everyone is mean to you, maybe the problem isn’t everyone, so much as it is YOU.”
JB had a good post up here the other day about how women who are in physically abusive relationships often secretly enjoy that and are drawn to men who will beat them, and purposely incite them to do just that, which is a perfect example of what I’m talking about.
Perhaps if your luck with women has lead you to conclude that all of them are like this, the problem isn’t with women so much as it is with you? Are you drawn to silly, shitty women for some reason?
Confirmation of your world view, maybe?
I’m not saying this to beat on you, specifically, but I see a lot of the same attitudes in the MRA movement as I see in feminism – “some women are shitheads” does not equate to “all women are shitheads” any more than “some men suck” should translate to “all men suck” from the other side. Be careful not to become that thing you hate, because if you do, you’ll be just as silly as they are.
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“How can such dumb men be so rich?”
I was thinking the same. I don’t know anyone like this, though, and I know a lot of affluent people. My husband went on a pheasant hunting trip and his roomate looked something like Willy Nelson and had more money than the Queen of England, and he sure as hell doesn’t have a sugar baby (unless it’s something he keeps secret like crotch-rot, but I can’t even IMAGINE it).
Furthermore, I don’t know women like this either. I’m sure they exist but I have to wonder if the world wide web isn’t altering reality a bit.
The history of psychiatry is repleat with examples of mental disorders coming and going. To name a few: Social anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, attention deficit-hyperactivity disorder, gender identity disorder, multiple personality disorder, anorexia, and chronic fatigue syndrome were once seen as rare or nonexistent, then suddenly ballooned in popularity.
This is not simply because people decided to “come out”, or became newly aware of their problems…It is because most mental disorders have a social component. Prozac isn’t prescribed like candy because so many more people than ever before are truly clinically depressed today.
One wouldn’t think that an affliction like Apotemnophilia could possibly be catchy, but it is. In fact, such disorders (even that one, weird as it is) do skyrocket and become self-fulfilling prophecies once popularized. Maybe this is some sort of erotic financial humiliation psychoses along the lines of what leap of beta mentions above?
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“Perhaps if your luck with women has lead you to conclude that all of them are like this, the problem isn’t with women so much as it is with you? Are you drawn to silly, shitty women for some reason?
Confirmation of your world view, maybe?”
Goober, or maybe it’s that the vast majority of women are as TMG described.
Maybe it’s because good attractive women are very, very, very rare, and men are in competition for those women with men much better than they.
So, as in all things. most men have to settle for what they can get. Most women also settle, but only after having their sexual fun.
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They want the girlfriend experience.
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These men are lonely as opposed to horny.
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How can such dumb men be so rich?
Well, no one ever went broke underestimating the hunger of the public for useless crap and vapid, tasteless entertainment. At least a few of these dumb men were apparently just smart enough to figure out that even with their minimal abilities and talents, they could provide the right kind of one or the other in sufficient quantity to make a fortune out of it. Others are “trust fund babies” who couldn’t make a fortune on their own even if they defecated gold, but have been left enough of daddy’s/mommy’s/uncle’s money that they don’t have to worry about the impossible (i.e., earning a living on their own merit).
Also, if you work in the corporate world, you’ll see that Scott Adams’ Dilbert Principle is the operative mode everywhere. It explains how people who couldn’t even wipe their own asses without hieroglyphic instructions printed on the toilet paper (and even then would need step-by-step verbal assistance from someone with basic literacy skills) inevitably wind up “leading” (HAH!) corporations and organizations – at least nominally. Since the overwhelming majority of these clueless, grossly overpaid figureheads are men, at least some of them attract sugar baby gold diggers.
I’ve found myself occasionally lamenting the fact that certain prominent asshole sugar daddies weren’t completely cleaned out by their sugar babies (Marla Maples’s dumping and fleecing of Donald Trump comes readily to mind as an example). Apparently even most of the really dumb rich guys have just enough sense not to lose ALL of their money, or, more likely, have someone much smarter than they are managing it for them.
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I hope not deti. I hope that you and tmg are wrong. Otherwise we’re all royally fucked.
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I’m not sure why, but I find it oddly satisfying that predictions I made about American women I made years ago are coming true. That after the death of marriage, two classes of women would emerge dominant: The business type who managed to get a useful degree from college and thereby never has sex again because by the time she’s ready to marry, she’s gotten way too fat to touch, and the outright prostitute. Sex is going to be reduced to a service with an hourly rate.
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Shove it in your crack. We’ve had quite enough female shaming language directed at us to ignore reality. You’re not impressive.
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” I find it oddly satisfying that predictions I made about American women I made years ago are coming true.”
Do you actually live in America and witness this phenomenon firsthand? Or have you come to this conclusion from reading online materials that validate your paradigm?
If it’s the first, you need to hang out with a different crowd. If the latter, that’s like getting all your knowledge of a community from reading and watching the news (hint: things like “murder didn’t happen” and “today was a mundane, normal day” and “look at all the people who have helped their fellow man by small random acts of kindness” don’t make the news, though it does describe about 95 percent of what happens) and believing that’s an accurate assessment of typical day to day events.
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LOL. Number of people who understood that comment: two.
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I know what that means!
I read about it on Grace Bellavue’s blog.
http://gracebellavue.com/ (NSFW)
I’m very worldly.
😛
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I think some men like the illusion of their own attractiveness. Having to pay someone directly to act like they like you, even though it results in guaranteed results, is an automatic fail.
However, by waving cash around, but not having any direct say over what affectionate activity happens, I imagine that they feel like what they did manage to get was actually more genuine.
And the girl can retain the self-delusion of some contrast between her and the street-corner girls.
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I disagree with one thing you said: feminism’s root. It’s lesbianism, not victimology.
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Lesbianism is certainly a root of some of the more radical feminists: feminist separatism is largely a lesbian-driven movement. But all my reading has shown the more mainstream feminism to be a Marxist philosophy based on victimology (hence feminism’s lack of accountability and responsibility) and supported by a reliance on the Apex Fallacy.
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Necklace seems the equal but opposite rendition of Heartiste’s “be an asshole” advice for men, but to ladies.
I was thinking the same thing. Just a different version of “game.”
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I don’t think the sugar daddy thing is common- but it does exist. Someone mentioned Donald Trump and I think he’s a good example of the ego running amok with his success. So, if I had to guess, I’d say this phenomenon happens when rich, older men want a hot younger woman to satisfy their ego. Most successful people have worked to hard to be so careless with their money, but maybe a certain level of wealth brings a healthy dose of arrogance too.
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A 70 year old man, grey hair, possibly bald head, wrinkles, sagging, not in the best of shape, you know, your average senior citizen, apart from the fact that he’s totally loaded. If he has more common sense than ego he will understand that these young nyphettes are just in it for the money and gifts and not to have sex with him. Sounds like a pretty mutual (albeit shallow and superficial, but hey, so long no one is really hurt it’s not my business) agreement to me. I also don’t really care when rich people lose a few bob. Rich people can afford to lose a few bob on a pearl necklace or a fancy dinner in Mayfair and still have food to eat, clothes on their backs, a roof over their head and all the amazing luxuries they own. They are not exactly going to be on the housing list bidding for properties or crying to the DWP for a crisis loan.
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I need a rich old man to take care of me and etc
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Yeah, I miss all of that. I miss the idea of that. I miss the quiet morning coffee while watching the sun glow in her hair. I miss all of the comfort and contentment and companionship that brought me for, um, a scattered 6 months out of the 4 years I was married.
After 13 years in family court, three of which overlapped my marriage, I’ve resigned myself to not having it, because I’m not EVER going through that shit again.
Its not the crazy bitch, it’s the legal system that let her do it. I can protect myself from it, to some extent, but I can’t shield my kids from retaliation.
I’m not spending my time with women of negotiable virtue, either. Not that I have a problem with it, it’s just that my ex confused “married” with “being a sugar baby” sense of entitlement, and basically did the shit enumerated above. I’d get a bad vibe from the “lets pretend I care for 90 minutes” aspect, and that would be the end of that.
I think that’s going to be the fallout of these women, too – they’re not going to have any practice at a relationship, instead, it will be all of the dynamics of ‘shit testing for presents’. They’ll pursue their marriage just like this scam.
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You didn’t mention the third type – clown car welfare queen. Another one exploiting sex instead of working.
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I need money to help pay my bills
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Agreed, the exploitation goes both ways, but are the sugardaddies really trying to use tricks within the “relationship deal”?
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I know two guys who do this, both are in their late 40s. One took the plunge and after seeing the girls he was showing up with and with some tutoring the second gave it a whirl. Basically, they take the time to chat up waitresses and suggest that instead of working 20 hours a week for $10 an hour they can go out twice a week for $200 and skip the job (or not). Guy1 has a girl he’s been seeing steady for nearly two years, Guy2 is still bouncing around… his “friends” seem to arrive and depart on about 6 month intervals. I doubt that the girls in the article are getting $10k a month… my friends’ “friends” seem pretty clear on the idea that there are plenty of girls out there that would jump at $1k a month if they start with the drama. My GF is amused by the idea and is very nice to them although she’s not going to BFF them.
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Reading that article- I feel rather nauseous.
I seem to recall it was called “clipping” in the Soho underworld…
Weaponised sexuality is so *ugly*
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“Is there a danger she might accidentally suffocate under the bag of cash her Sugar Daddy provides her?” LOL (really). Comic gold! Great article
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wanted a older ad rich guy for relationshp,, i stay n banglore india
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I’m pretty sure most wealthy older men dating/marrying much younger women know the score. Any one that doesn’t is a first class fool. The Eagles have a song “Lying Eyes”.
The only choice the much older man has is to turn a blind eye to her “friends”. That is if he wants companionship from a much younger woman. If he doesn’t, he can kick her out. But then he’ll be alone or forced to hook up with women closer to his own age.
Remember, “monogamy” is not necessarily “natural”. And it certainly isn’t when there is a huge age gap.
We really need to start getting pragmatic about mating.
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That’s Bruce’s daughter “Rumer” in the photo with him.
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Oh that website. I am glad someone found a use for all the god-awful stock photography out there. Stock photographers have gotta eat, too!
Also, these sugar babies need to realize that not only does their job involve having sex with geriatrics, it involves making them believe that the sex is enjoyable. I mean, really, that’s the entire point, right? Making the man feel virile and attractive well past his prime? (And yes, men DO have primes.) Pumping his ego while he’s pumping you… that’s just good customer service. Otherwise, what’s the point? Trying to wheedle out of sex will lose them a valuable account.
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“But then he’ll be alone or forced to hook up with women closer to his own age.”
… or there are dozens of thrill-seeking co-eds (or, more accurately, disillusioned Master Degree holding Starbucks employees) that will happily take her place, if the price is right.
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Beauty is an asset. No point not capitalizing on it. The rich fart gets a trophy, she gets cash. What’s needed now is an investment advisory service for these girls, to make them realise that beauty is a diminishing asset and they need to capitalize on it as fast and furiously as possible. Less shoes, more stocks and bonds.
The only real problem with these arrangements is the pretense. Other people see hotties with old geezers and get the impression that hotties are genuinely attracted to fat, balding middle aged men. Then they start hitting on girls themselves, not realising that girls find them disgusting.
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I want a sugar daddy
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It was probably one of those rich old men who came up with ‘The Wife Disposal Service’ – I’m surprised this hasn’t been banned yet !
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I read the title of this article and thought it was about Wendy Davis.
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Liz wrote:
One wouldn’t think that an affliction like Apotemnophilia could possibly be catchy, but it is.
Bwaahaha! I remember when the DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL HOOKS girl used to troll alt.tasteless for contributions to her operation fund. Evidently she cast her hooks further than a.t.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=64354
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I need a money and i want very very rich gril
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Above comment for jenny.
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First of all, I want to say that I agree with 95% of what you say on your website regarding women and feminism.
But where the hell are you getting the idea that liberal feminism is against prostitution? In way too places, I have seen that “feminists” are very pro-hooker. That is one of the reasons I left this movement and I hope it disintegrates good.
So you found the one article in all of feminismdom, referenced in your blog post above, that condemns prostitution. That is a good thing because it means that this one solitary author is not totally lost to the cult of liberal feminism, and thus she can still be saved.
Apparently you are not aware that for every one article that rightly criticizes prostitution for the blight on society that it is, there are hundreds of feminist opinions that praise and laud and hail a hooker for being a strong independent powerful woman in charge of her own life. In other words, they think that being a hooker is being a liberal feminist. It is self-evident that the people that condone being slutty and dressing slutty are the exact same people that condone hookering.
Maybe you have not heard of the British TV show featuring Billie Piper where they hail her hooker character as a “strong, independent woman in charge of her own life.” The character seems to think so, the writers and producers seem to think so, and the viewing audience seems to think so.
There was some website a few years ago where some female was auctioning off her virginity. This female was insisting that this life choice was opening up people’s closed little minds, getting them to rethink society’s rules and narrow views of women, some shit like that. Um, no it’s not, it’s just getting fucked for cash. Maybe I’m mixing up two different people, I really don’t remember.
There was a book by Gaelen Foley several years back that was about a prostitute in the 1700s. The author claimed that this book “challenged women’s roles in society,” “ushered in forward-thinking views on women,” all that crap. And the amazon.com reviews, all 400 or so of them, agree with the author. These are the exact same people that endorse general sluttiness and loss of morals. All liberal feminists.
Do you not remember, about a decade ago, how many “liberal free-thinking progressive” females rose the movie “Pretty Woman” from the dead and hailed it as a prostitute anthem?
I just don’t understand how you can criticize sluttiness and then turn around and praise being a hooker. The same moral decay, social corruption, lies, filth, media warping, privileged white females praising something from a cocoon that will always be there to protect them, screwing with the minds of impressionable young girls, that surrounds liberal feminist sluttiness also surrounds the idea of being a hooker.
As I recall, you yourself were quite miffed when some feminist compared a faithful wife to a hooker. I recall that you were mad because the feminist claimed that a “stay-at-home mom owed her husband blowjobs because he was the breadwinner,” some gem like that.
Besides all that, your idea that a prostitute “has control of her own body and knows the worth of her own body” is simply a lie. You might want to check out this website: rapeforprofit.org. Peace out.
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http://www.hepays.com is also great for meeting rich men
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