My interview with Erin Pizzey

8 May

The most incredible thing about this interview, for me, was listening to Erin talk about where the money goes – jobs for girls.  The Domestic Violence Engine is a way to pay women to do administrative jobs and has nothing to do with protecting anyone from any kind of domestic violence anywhere.


I think she’s dead right.


21 Responses to “My interview with Erin Pizzey”

  1. caprizchka May 8, 2014 at 21:07 #

    Powerful and insightful.


  2. Jim May 9, 2014 at 04:35 #

    Good and insightful interview. Yet I would disagree with Erin a few things.

    First, men are not more emotionally (I don’t know where she’s getting that one. That’s just completely silly) or physically fragile than women. This is just plain absurd.

    Then why do men die sooner? That’s easy to answer. Men die on the front lines in war, are taken prisoner and murdered to tortured to death. Men take risks that women are unwilling to take. We take jobs that are much more dangerous (partially because women can’t do them). Other reasons: In today’s world, EVERYTHING is catered toward women. The schools, laws, the media, working environment, and more.

    In the old days men had to earn the bread and most jobs are either extremely physically taxing and some were outright dangerous, much more so than today. Today men are under FAR more stress than women. Why? Simple. women have choices, men have responsibilities. It must be nice.

    Women can hit you all they want but a man can’t hit back. His life is thoroughly destroyed in family court at a woman’s and the government’s whim. You see, men have nothing but obligations and are under TREMENDOUS pressure to do so. Always have been. Women are constantly protected from these kinds of things and are constantly babied and spoiled by the system and mangina-white knight men.

    Now, with the government and women doing everything they can to keep the father away from their children is it any wonder that so many men are not only losing their sense of masculinity but have becoming either complete pussies or criminals?

    EVERYTHING has become politicized because of big government. Feminism and all these other twisted crusades and special interest groups will NOT disappear until people get sick of living under a nanny state. If you want a good place to learn how and why it got to this point start here:


  3. Goober May 9, 2014 at 17:41 #

    I’ve never understood the confusion as to why men die before women.

    Anyone to which the answer to that question is not obvious is either stupid, or is being deliberately obtuse.

    Who works the dangerous jobs? Who works the stressful jobs? Who lifts the heavy things? Who works outside in the elements, and not in an air conditioned office? Who is expected to take risks? Who’s job is more likely to matter, to have dire consequences if not done correctly, and to have strict timelines to complete it? Who?

    The answer to all of those questions is “men”.

    Okay, so forget about occupations. Who drives the cars in auto races, drives the vast majority of motorcycles on the highway, and who is going to be pictured in an internet meme saying “hold my beer and watch this!”

    Men, of course. Not only do we do the scut work, we also take more risks. It’s just part of being who we are.

    Who has the choice to take a less stressful job, because their partner will pick up the slack, earnings-wise? Who has the choice to not take a job at all? Who has a multitude of different options to get through life without facing down the Hobbesian brutality of the real world, if they so choose?

    Women. That’s who.

    I’m not saying that no women choose that, or that they are incapable of doing so, I’m just saying that they have that choice. Men do not.

    Why don’t men live as long?



  4. numbcruncher May 9, 2014 at 22:03 #

    JB I appreciate this question might have been (very) frequently asked, but how do I go about getting into the queue to marry you?

    Or – God forbid – that queue is now closed, have you any sisters etc?

    I would pledge my undying love but that would be harassment. Would hugs and kisses be permissible?


  5. Rebecca May 9, 2014 at 23:34 #

    I read her book Prone to Violence and was awed by her compassion in working with violently dysfunctional families. Thank you for this.


  6. Jim May 10, 2014 at 15:25 #

    There are times I wonder why people are clueless about this either. Maybe this almost OCD drive for a unicorn (known as “equality”) drives it. Probably some kind of denial on their part so they have to invent another explanation. Nature isn’t “equitable”, nor is it fair in any way. That’s why parents used to tell their children that life isn’t fair. It never has been and never will be.


  7. Luke May 12, 2014 at 01:46 #

    JB is faithfully, happily married with kids, numbcruncher. I haven’t seen that she mentions a sister, but does have some noncipher female friends.


  8. Luke May 12, 2014 at 22:19 #

    I listened to the interview all the way through. Erin Pizzey was an excellent choice as someone to hear what she had seen, done, heard, and concluded.

    Some opinions on what she had to say:

    1) She once found objectionable that unmarried women had difficulty getting MDs to write them prescriptions for oral birth control drugs. Why would any Christian or other opponent of fornication, prostitution, bastardy, etc, want unmarried women to be having sex in any event? It’s like knowingly selling guns to career armed robbers, saying that you wanted them to at least have ones with safety selectors, so they could ply their trade more safely.

    Consider how a fair case could be made for abortion clinics near college campuses having signs put up that if your fetus is healthy, you should instead investigate how giving it up for adoption at birth works. Well, when unmarried women go looking for birth control, perhaps they could encounter a postcard asking them if they have self-control. Answer yes, the card prescribes celibacy. Answer no, the card gives directions to how to get legally married in that state.

    2) Likewise, she commented (apparently disliking) a woman having to have a man’s name on a mortgage or credit card account. If a woman is an unmarried adult, that’s one thing; I can see where she’s coming from on that. However, if a woman is MARRIED, then why should she have the ability to unilaterally incur major debt that her husband will be legally forced (in or after marriage) to repay? This is akin to the worst abuses wayward wives inflicted on innocent estranged husbands via the old coverture laws (pre-WWI stuff).

    3) The banner covering 1/4 the screen IDIng you (JB) stills display the entire time the camera is on you. It’s pointless, annoying, and makes seeing the body language part of your communications less visible. Why not put a small square in the top left of the screen (over the “Google” word) where there is nothing of importance showing to lose view of?

    More later…


  9. judgybitch May 12, 2014 at 22:27 #

    Can you move the banner in hangouts? I’m not sure that’s an option. I’ll check!


  10. Luke May 13, 2014 at 09:25 #

    A resource for you, JB. This author is a woman in her 40s who’s been in the MRM for a while, is friends with Paul Elam of A Voice For Men, etc. She has some interviews she’s done with MRM activists linked to in this piece a ways down, that you could look at to see how someone else does this.

    Here are some direct links: (she interviews a woman, Miss Matchar) (Dean Esmay, interviewed byT
    The New Republic) (interviewed Paul Elam)

    Good essay of hers summarizing how feminism will destroy everything, so is unsustainable, whatever the feminists, manginas, and the men with guns they employ do:

    Lastly, if you have not yet seen this, I suspect you’d find it illuminating. It’s Valerie Solanus’s “The SCUM Manifesto”. SCUM = Society for Cutting Up Men”. It’s a “Final Solution” for men, feminist style. She tried to kill Andy Warhol. It’s as evil as “Mein Kampf”. Most importantly, she was not cast out of polite feminist society for this, the main point about it.


  11. Aye May 13, 2014 at 19:42 #

    I think working with families in crisis takes an extraordinary amount of compassion and pragmatism. I am deeply grateful to Erin Pizzey and others who broke the frontier of sheltering those who need to reset their lives for their own safety. If men and boys are excluded from compassion-services, then it can hardly be called compassion, now can it?


  12. C May 15, 2014 at 06:56 #

    I boggle about this one too. There are guys who don’t do risky things or have stressful jobs but they live in a world that doesn’t give much of a shit about their health and frequently pressures them to make life-shortening choices (risky sports, bad food, etc.)

    People seem utterly blind to the work that men do tool. I remember seeing an ad about helping women in third world countries (one of zillion of those..) and it was a host talking to people on the street. The host mentions that women have to walk such and such distances to get water and one of the women on the street says something to the effect of “That’s not fair, what do the men even do?”


  13. Jim May 20, 2014 at 05:37 #

    “The host mentions that women have to walk such and such distances to get water and one of the women on the street says something to the effect of “That’s not fair, what do the men even do?””

    Narcissistic to the core.


  14. JShaft May 20, 2014 at 08:32 #

    Ummm… I either missed the bit where she said she was christian, or she didn’t even say that. Also, if she is, you may find that non-Catholic christian sects in Britain have traditionally been, well, at least ambivalent about the whole reproductive system…

    I’ll be nice and not get into my personal feelings on the concept, because they’re complex, nuanced, and didn’t come from a book that predates the rhythm method :p


  15. JShaft May 20, 2014 at 08:51 #

    See, here I disagree… Not with the point, but with unachievable equality. Hear me out though…

    All I mean by equality is equality of opportunity, and in that I include opportunity to fail majestically. Everyone deserves a shot, and not to be judged on the possibilities, but the results.

    Sure, 99% of humanity couldn’t get into an MMA cage with a gifted amateur and walk back out under their own power, but for all any of us know, Rhonda Rousey could, and I emphasise COULD be the best fighter in the world in her weight class. Personally, I support her right to contest for the mens championship, should she ever want it.

    The problem is Feminism has twisted equality into a non-word. They got all Orwellian with that one. Tried to force it to mean equal results. Most women don’t do well in STEM subjects, that much is proven. Most don’t want to, that much we sane folk agree on. Demanding more women in STEM jobs is like demanding more chimpanzee bus drivers. If it happens, be prepared for a shitload of epic fail.

    However, there was a lady (She’s only a few weeks back on who was good enough to play an instrumental role in the Manhattan Project. Humans are unpredictable like that.

    Me, I judge people on the results. I work in a dangerous, sweary, sweaty, respectless, rude, heavy, nasty and ultimately vapid and meaningless job, and I honestly fucking love it. The strange hours, bizarre people and occasional lifethreatening emergencies. Proof evolution is an odd taskmaster. Whenever there’s a woman who signs up, most guys are instantly dismissive. That could be seen as sexist, but then small guys, or guys with nice hair also get the same initial distrust. Why? Well, I work in the coalface of entertainment, and no-one wants to die because a stack of festival-sized subwoffers just landed on your head, all because one person couldn’t lift as well as was needed, often on short notice.

    Some people, however, can lift, yell, swear, spit and make sexually inappropriate puns about “old, clapped-out saggy racks” and “Push harder, your mum did”, and have boobies at the same time. In the end, you got the humor, you got the skills, you got the strength, and you don’t cry about the hours, I want you on the same crew as me.

    That’s equality.

    Also, if I did bake cupcakes (I don’t bake, I cook, so sorry boys, no cupcakes), and someone said they were good, for cupcakes baked by a man, well, they best have their running shoes on.

    Results. They work 🙂



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