I am so glad we are giving our money to a veteran’s hall

12 Jun

This video by Terrence Popp absolutely shredded me.  It’s a powerful tribute to men who have served and who come back to families torn apart and destroyed by divorce.  They are strangers to their children and enemies to the family courts.

 

I knew about soldiers with traumatic brain injuries and PTSD, and I wrote about that here, but I had never really considered the true impact of the  family/divorce angle.

 

How heart-breaking.  Who are these women, and why do they do this?  I can’t come up with any plausible answers, possibly because I have not experienced what it is like to have my husband deployed to a war zone, but it seems to me this was not the case when WWII soldiers returned.  90% of married WWII soldiers did not get divorced, surely?

 

What the hell, ladies?  You seem a lot like monsters to me.

 

 

 

 

17 Responses to “I am so glad we are giving our money to a veteran’s hall”

  1. tarzanwannabe June 12, 2014 at 22:17 #

    So cold, empty, horrid. I shudder to think this plight could be my son someday. Had I the chance to ask “Happy now?”, I’d probably not bother. We already know the answer.

    Like

  2. nrjnigel June 12, 2014 at 22:59 #

    The figures are shocking on their own. Is there no shame? Can so many be so selfish. I was literally stunned having seen this.

    Like

  3. patriarchal landmine June 12, 2014 at 23:09 #

    liberals love to brag about how many american soldiers return to america only to commit suicide. but they loath admitting the reason why.

    Like

  4. nrjnigel June 12, 2014 at 23:49 #

    Re the WW2 issue. I don’t know about the US but in the UK the all encompassing nature of the war probably played a part in a generally supportive set of values that supported the majority of the returning service men ( and women). But I wonder about later conflicts which have formed small enclaves in the generally self obsessed culture the Dawn of which was known here as the “me generation” some thirty plus years ago. The UK has had for many years a small volunteer set of services which is generally treated as disposable . The prolonged Afghan war shifted that disregard a bit. This vid did make me want to find the situation for vets and divorce here.

    Like

  5. C June 13, 2014 at 03:05 #

    Wasn’t this a big problem after Vietnam too? I remember hearing about how these drafted men came back and were called murderers and oppressors (thanks feminism.)

    I know a guy with severe ptsd after coming back from Iraq and his wife has stuck by him but it seems very difficult. He hasn’t talked to anyone for a while now; just shut everyone out. It seems awful to put someone so vulnerable through a divorce but it isn’t always possible for a family to work around the disorder.

    I don’t doubt that there are plenty who don’t even try though…

    Like

  6. nrjnigel June 13, 2014 at 09:03 #

    This reminded me of a documentary about Patrick Stewart researching his father. In this case his mother had stuck by her husband stoically showing great love really. Patrick Stewart,famous star trek and X-Men actor. Is a interesting case. Long a poster boy for Domestic Violence  campaigns he researched his father’s war experience. His father who had been abusive, the reason for Patrick Stewarts campaigning. Like so many soldiers Mr. Stewart’s father had never talked about his WW2 experiences. It turned out his father had a pretty traumatic time. Indeed it became clear that he had had a period of “shell shock” before returning to duty for another traumatic period. Mr. Stewart reevaluated his father in terms of what we would now identify as classic post traumatic mental illness. Not excusing the abuse it did show that far from being the result of a patriarchal ideology, his father’s apparent domineering behaviours were clearly the result of his wartime trauma. Why mention this? Well just because Mr. Patrick’s journey showed so clearly,  in one story , the stupidity of the Feminist  Patriarchy theory and the damage it causes. Finally it helped Patrick Stewart understand his mother, who knew more of her husband’s traumas and had tried to her best to deal with her very damaged husband. Who had come back from war a different person. 
    Sadly we are little further on now.  In a similar situation a struggling partner will just get lectured about their oppression and the abuser dragged through the criminal justice system and possibly “treatment” that amounts to little more than political lectures.

    Like

  7. Sean44SS (@Sean44SS) June 13, 2014 at 12:11 #

    Dear JB

    I am green with envy of those who are going to the conference. I’d truly LOVE to be with you all in Detroit.

    Will watch from the sidelines here in England.

    Hope it goes well.

    Kind regards.

    Like

  8. John June 13, 2014 at 12:30 #

    Here is the way I see things. When a guy gets married, these kinds of things happen all the time. The woman isn’t happy so she gets divorced and the guy gets financially raped. Every guy knows this in advance this can happen. Yet they marry and have kids anyway. Preventable problem.

    To make an analogy- if I wear a Yankee jersey to Fenway Park in Boston, I am asking for trouble. Probably will be harassed and maybe get beaten up by being outnumbered. It is unfair but that’s the way it is. Only way to avoid it is to not wear that jersey. Maybe you can get lucky and sit in a section with nice fans and nobody will bother you. But you are exposing yourself to risk.

    Same thing with any guy getting married and having kids. You expose yourself to huge financial risk. It isn’t fair but that’s the way it is. Its almost hard to feel sorry for any guy going down this path because they know the risk going in and proceed anyway.

    This video is a sad tale, but this guy should have known the potential for this before he walked down the aisle. Sad to say that this type of behavior ruins it for the ladies that can do the right thing and don’t take advantage of the divorce laws. But it isn’t worth the risk.

    Like

  9. Ron Reddick June 13, 2014 at 14:22 #

    Chilling video, and we should not forget that even when the USA is not at war we have veterans returning home from conflict. Any any one time the military has over 2500 combat troops deployed in so called undeclared conflicts. This is mainly composed of Army Special Forces, Delta, Seals, and Marine Spec Ops personnel.

    I spent 8 years in Spec Ops in the 80’s and came home after deployment to a divorce, granted it is hard on the spouse for these missions, as most are classified and you cannot tell them where you are going or for how long. Most of my team mates ended up in divorce as well, and 25 years on I do not know of one that is still married to their spouse from that time, and most have remained single.

    When you couple the abuse of the court system towards men in divorce and the lack of true equality in the eyes of the court with the failing VA system, the returning vet is left on their own, you cannot talk to friends, as they for the most part do not understand or want to hear it. And I found that for myself I did not wish to make myself more vulnerable then I already was to outside criticism for actions taken to lived through.

    I would be curious to see the stats on the returning female vets, are the divorce rates as high, the PTSD issues as severe, and how is the court treating them when it comes to divorce and custody. Are they being the labeled the same as the man in the video, a killer, not fit to be a mother, or is the “equality” factor of womanhood being given the same preference to them even though they are a Vet. I am not taking anything at all away from their service or risks and sacrifices they have made, they are part of the brothers-in-arms fraternity (do we need a new name?). But it is a real question, are they being treated different by the courts then a male vet.

    We need some research, but also a better way to change the culture and the laws to support men in general in divorce and Vets coming home with equality and understanding, not leave them in ruins for the rest of their lives.

    Ron

    Like

  10. Joe June 13, 2014 at 16:02 #

    While divorce wasn’t higher, the wives of the armed forces have long committed a ridiculously high level of cheating. Yes, even during the II. I’m not talking about the ladies with ‘dead’ or missing husbands either. My aunt (who did lose her husband) was amazed (being a small town girl) at the casual way the women’s cliques admitted to casual sex with men other than their husbands. Given the state of birth control back then, she figured that 2 of 5 kids were probably not the husband’s progeny.

    Like

  11. Jim June 13, 2014 at 16:22 #

    This is why you NEVER put your life on the line for The Imperial City on the Potomac or (the vast majority of) women. They’ll turn on you in a second.

    Like

  12. Ron Reddick June 13, 2014 at 18:04 #

    Jim – I am proud I served my country, and though ROTC I got my Undergrad and Masters degrees and learned how to manage a team of highly skilled people in very very tough situations. This has helped my throughout my entire career and starting a tech business.

    Beyond that, those that serve do so for many reasons, and one of them is to protect your right to call the DC “The Imperial City”.

    Pick on government all day long, no problem, but do not pick on those who choose to serve.

    ron

    Like

  13. Jim June 14, 2014 at 00:31 #

    “…and one of them is to protect your right to call the DC “The Imperial City”. ”

    Nonsense. You’re only fooling yourself.

    “Pick on government all day long, no problem, but do not pick on those who choose to serve.”

    Who says I did? That’s why I referred to DC as The Imperial City. you’re not a politician or a city so why take offense?

    Another question though. Serve who? You’re unintentionally serving the ambitions of those in power and the politically connected corporations. A good place to start understanding this would be here:

    http://www.ratical.org/ratville/CAH/warisaracket.pdf

    Like

  14. Liz June 14, 2014 at 20:50 #

    Those women seem like monsters to me, too, JB.
    And my husband has deployed many times to many different places.

    Like

  15. C June 15, 2014 at 08:48 #

    Did Patrick Stewart really learn though? Just last year he was part of the amnesty international “violence against women” thing. I think a lot of people KNOW that DV is a lot more complicated than some stupid “patriarchy” theory but still have the urge to protect women and ONLY women.

    Like

  16. Mike June 22, 2014 at 21:24 #

    Since you decided to censor my comment, here’s RamzPaul offering you the same kind of red pill:

    Anyway, have a nice life.

    Like

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