When you start to talk about why your day was so shitty he will nod sympathetically and (after obtaining consent) pat you on the back tenderly and make soothing affirmative noises as you search for someone to blame. He will agree that it was the baristas fault you spilled latte all over that report you had to hand in to the senior management team because she made the coffee too hot.
The commenters are freaking out! Ha ha hahahahaha!
judgybitch 
Ha! You truly have a gift for getting a rise out of people.
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As an aside I think your choice of picture might not be the best. Lots of girls would put up with unsexy behavior from a hot movie star. Of course, the feminists are already ragging on the poor awkward unsexy guys out there, claiming they’re the real misogynists so maybe piling on from the manosphere side and calling them manginas is just mean. Guys who aren’t at the top of their game seem to have everyone after them these days.
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JB, Great satire!
Sisyphean,
If you apply the Pareto Principle to dating, the men you speak of are in the eighty percent. They’re getting it from all sides as their wheels spin in the mud,
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Well, not everything is bad about being a certain kind of feminist man.
1. You pay just 50%.
2. You expect her to be feminist, it means she works and earns money. So she pays 50%.
3. You are OK if she is an empowered woman. It means, probably she earns more than you. Sometimes even much more than you.
4. In consequence you allow her to pay more than 50%.
5. Well, if she pays 80, 90, 95% that is fab.Then you are a “mantenido”, a kind of gigoló, wich is fantastic!.
6. You do not give a fuck if she fucks around, cuz you fuck around too. You can keep a kind of Sartre/Beauvoir couple.
7. Probably she is bisexual so she can invite her girfriends to the common bed.
8. If she is really feminist she should be against marriage. Good point.
10. If she is very very feminist probably she thinks that children suck. Another good point.
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Haha. I must not know very many feminist men or women, because most of the PEOPLE I know have decent hygiene (I for one spend about as much time on my beauty routine as my husband does shaving), can cook, and can acknowledge that they play some part in their own problems.
But I have a question for men: would you say that just as a man shouldn’t enable a woman when she blames her failures and unhappiness on everyone else, so a woman shouldn’t enable a man trying to do the same thing?
Because from my observation of life, women don’t have a monopoly on blaming others for their problems and seeking out enablers who can help them to continue avoiding responsibility. Should men also avoid a woman who’s eager to rub their backs while they gripe about their day?
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Some of that is…quite accurate, from my experiences with a male feminist a few years ago (never actually a relationship, thankfully).
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“women don’t have a monopoly on blaming others for their problems”
Yes but nobody gives a shit when a man complains. He’s just a “whiner”. It’s also not nearly as common.
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In my experience, individual personality and maturity level are greater predictors of whether a person complains a lot than gender is.
But again, I apparently don’t know many feminists of either gender. Pretty much everyone I know likes to shower regularly, for example, and I don’t see any couples walking around with a clean and well-groomed man and a smelly, sloppy woman.
I do know lots of women, myself included, who have husbands who couldn’t care less if we shaved our legs or did various things to our faces — and what I see is mostly that we take care of ourselves because it makes us feel good — not because we are “red pill” wives worried about hubby taking off with some hot chick in tight yoga pants.
I noticed that the way Janet worded the appearance thing was that a feminist man will get you to do stop bothering to do the stuff that makes you feel good about your appearance (I’m paraphrasing ’cause no time to pull it up now). I just don’t see real life women ditching the routines that make them feel good based on whether they’re husbands think it’s necessary or not.
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By the way, I know that female obesity isn’t an issue that’s being directly addressed here, but I think it kind of falls within the area of “patriarchal beauty standards,” and from reading the manosphere, it seems like it’s a female issue. I certainly think it’s a problem, don’t get me wrong. But today I found myself wondering whether it’s really true that there are all these buff, gorgeous middle-aged men tolerating their fat saggy wives — I mean, it’s not what I see here in the Midwest. Obesity’s a problem for both genders here. So I looked it up, and it seems like the percentage of obese men is a little higher than that of obese women.
I suppose that what the manosphere’s making fun of is the fact that many fat women still want to hear that they’re beautiful, while fat men are willing to accept that they’re not beautiful and either do something about it or just accept it. I can see that my own weight isn’t where it should be. I’d actually had an epiphany a couple of years ago, and through yoga and better eating had lost nearly 100 lbs. — but I’ve slipped back into my old habits and have gained all but about 30 of it back.
I don’t think it’s gorgeous, and I don’t need anyone to say that it is — but I think we all have our stuff we need to work on. I sure don’t think anyone’s “obliged” to date or marry a fat person; if anyone has a vice that’s intolerable to you, by all means stay away from them. But again, obesity seems like a pretty straight-across-the-board HUMAN vice and not just one of them there “female problems.”
So maybe it’s just being treated as a women’s problem because there are more women than men wanting standards re-defined to accommodate fat people?
http://kff.org/other/state-indicator/adult-overweightobesity-rate-by-gender/
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Your writing is exquisite and the comments depressing. The lack of logic in the Western world would make Socrates hang his head in shame.
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Spaniard…if you’re a real grown up with a pair dangling between your legs you make enough for three people so you’re entire list is ridiculous! You’re list of talking points a for a pre-pubescent teenager living in his mother’s finished basement not for an adult male that wants a life partner especially if both partners want to procreate and bring kids into the world. Where do you men learn these childish ideas?
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Exactly Jim!
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Speaking of putting on makeup in the time it takes a man to shave, is there really any reason other than vanity for taking more than five minutes a day to do makeup for work?
I can’t get a straight answer out of anyone on this. One woman wanted to explain to me the intricacies of applying foundation and didn’t seem to grasp that foundation was probably not essential to getting ahead on the job. I mean, I do get that being good-looking has value in the workplace, but is there something about makeup that makes it a requirement beyond, say, working out at the gym?
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Even a man on top of his game will be attacked if he pisses off a group of feminists. Many alpha males get attacked ruthlessly by feminism simply due to their masculine features, getting called out for being so weak, they have to make themselves “appear” stronger. They can spin anything dealing with men, into a mangina fallacy(no pun intended)
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“I mean, I do get that being good-looking has value in the workplace, but is there something about makeup that makes it a requirement beyond, say, working out at the gym?”
Well hamster logic dictates that time not at the gym can be made up for in front of a mirror, since they are both time being spent on beauty.
Any sane male will pick a fit woman with no makeup versus Miss Piggy any day.
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That_Susan is my favorite. 😉
#hamsteronsteroids
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Watch a few make up tutorials on YouTube. Especially where they apply layers of eyeshadow.
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Who knows, really. I do know that I weigh the same as I did in college and that women my age outweigh me, and not by a little. If I want to go out with a woman who looks comparable to me I have to go about twenty years younger. It’s depressing at times, frankly.
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Your lack of contribution is noted.
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It’s actually rare that I’ve taken more than a few minutes to put on makeup, and I prefer a clean face over foundation, so the little bit of makeup I do, if I do it, doesn’t take long. I was talking more about just basic daily hygiene — keeping clean, fixing hair (again, not time consuming as I just brush or comb it and don’t like the feel of styling gel), and all kinds of other miscellaneous details that I don’t expect would be that interesting for a guy to hear about. 🙂
I personally do find exercise a lot more morale and beauty enhancing than makeup — so yeah, a good workout would be the best choice for any woman who feels like she doesn’t have time to do both makeup and working out.
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I don’t know about hamsters, but I don’t know of any woman who feels like wearing makeup makes up for being overweight. For the heavy women who do spend a lot of time and money on their face, hair, and clothing, I think it’s more a case of finding it very difficult to lose the weight and wanting to at least do SOMETHING to feel pretty.
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Kudos to you for staying so fit! I know a few women who’ve managed to do that, and it seems like many of them say that it’s just easy for them and they don’t gain weight. Most women, even if they stay in a healthy weight range, do tend to put on at least a few pounds after college.
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Your lack of understanding is noted. I was referring to the comments on the original Thought Catalog posting, not here on JB’s WordPress. But thanks.
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