Tag Archives: Don’t be that guy

Most women don’t kill their babies and leave them in dumpsters. Most men don’t rape drunk women, even while drunk themselves. So why are men taught NOT to rape, but women aren’t taught not to kill? I call bullshit.

9 Apr





Way to go, Canada!  Men’s human rights activists are back in the news in Canada for another “offensive” poster campaign in which all women are painted with a brush that applies to only a few women.


Sound familiar?


The poster not only highlights the utterly insulting absurdity of the original “Don’t Be That Guy” campaign, but also points to a legally enshrined form of discrimination against men in Canada:  only female persons can be convicted of the crime of murdering their newborn children, and just to rub a little salt in the wound, the poor wee dears are not to be sentenced to anything exceeding five years.  The babies, of course, are sentenced to death regardless of their gender, but that’s such a trifle, no?




What happens in Canada if a male person kills his newborn? Well, first of all, it rarely happens.  Male persons are significantly less likely to kill newborn infants than female persons, when the child is less than 24 hours old. Once the baby survives the first 24 hours, then male persons are slightly more likely to kill the child. Regardless of how old the child is, as long as Cupcake can prove she “has not fully recovered from the effects of giving birth to the child and by reason thereof or of the effect of lactation consequent on the birth of the child her mind is then disturbed“, she can be sentenced to no more than five years.


Obviously men don’t lactate, but are their minds disturbed by the birth of a new child?  The law says “fuck you we don’t care if you have a penis and kill a baby you are going down”.  Science says, well, actually, men do undergo some fairly dramatic and measureable hormonal changes following the birth of a child, and if hormonal changes are mitigating circumstances that permit female persons to be convicted of the lesser offence of infanticide, then why aren’t those changes used to explain why male persons might kill newborn babies?


Misandry? Actual, literal discrimination on the basis of gender alone? Pffft. It’s not a real thing.


But let’s get back to those posters.  The original posters were intended to urge “men to heed their consciences and not take advantage of incapacitated or unwilling partners”. But do men do this?  What is the evidence?


Oh darn.


When researchers at the University of Toronto and the University of Washington observed young people’s behavior in bars, they found that the man’s aggressiveness didn’t match his level of intoxication. There was no relationship.


So wait, you mean men can get fully and completely loaded, just shit-faced drunk and they still won’t rape anybody?  Well my heavens, how can that be?  Who, pray tell, is doing all this raping then?


Sexual predators deliberately target intoxicated victims.


Sexual predators?  You mean rapists?  You mean it’s rapists who rape women and not just random guys in bars who have had too much to drink?


Don’t Be That Guy – a behavioural marketing campaign sends the message that sex without consent is sexual assault. We are sending a visual message to men between the ages of 18 and 25, graphically demonstrating their role in ending alcohol facilitated sexual assaults.


Men between the ages of 18 and 25?  And where is your evidence that men between the ages of 18 and 25 are particularly prone to alcohol facilitated sexual assaults?  According to RAINN, the average age of a rapist is 31 years old.


You’re not even aiming at the right target, assholes.


And even if you were in the right ballpark demographically, it still wouldn’t excuse the accusation that every male person in the demographic needs to be learned up about how not to get drunk and rape, because most men aren’t rapists. Even the wingnuts at Occidental College agree that most rapes on college campuses are committed by serial rapists.


So explain to me again why all men between the ages of 18-25 should be smeared with the rapist label and treated as if they are latent monsters who only need that one last Budweiser to release the Great Rape Monster lurking within their twisted, maimed pathetic male person souls?


What would the reaction be if we treated all women as baby killers until they prove otherwise?  What would it be like to have every prenatal healthcare clinic feature posters reminding women not to murder their babies?






Some might call it hate speech. 



Personally, I’m not a big fan of the whole concept of hate speech.  The legal definition of hate speech in Canada focuses on the effects, rather than the intention of the speaker, which is all fine and dandy.


“The repugnancy of the ideas being expressed is not sufficient to justify restricting the expression, and whether or not the author of the expression intended to incite hatred or discriminatory treatment is irrelevant. The key is to determine the likely effect of the expression on its audience, keeping in mind the legislative objectives to reduce or eliminate discrimination,” they decided.

I prefer a much more simple remedy to hate speech.




Go ahead and put up your shitty, hateful, factually inaccurate posters about rape.


But understand this:  What goes around?


It comes around, too.




Lots of love,





Don’t be that guy? Let’s talk about those rape posters. [Corrected]

11 Jul

mra By now, likely everyone in the Manosphere has heard about the attention MRAEdmonton garnered when they countered the “Don’t Be That Guy” rape posters with their own “Don’t Be That Girl” ones.










Personally, I love the posters, but what I want to talk about today is the original campaign, designed to teach men not to commit sexual assault. On the surface, the original posters appear innocuous enough.  No, obviously, you should not be having sex with a woman so drunk she is passed out face down on the couch with her ass in the air.





No, you should not even think of having sex with a woman who is staggering around the men’s bathroom.




No, you should not be taking off your pants to fuck a chick passed out cold with an empty beer glass at her side and several more stacked on the bedside table.




Obviously, helping a drunk woman home does not entitle you to sex.





And in what is going to come as SHOCKING news to everyone, if someone doesn’t want to have sex with you, you should not have sex with them. I’ll give you a while to process that information, because I’m sure that until this clever campaign came along, you were all busy screwing comatose girls at parties and gleefully hailing cabs so you could help ladies home and then rape them.




Tsk tsk.


Bad boys.


I think I have found a way to illustrate just how offensive these campaigns are, and what the real intention behind them happens to be.





Look at this:  the bike theft capital of the world is none other than Toronto, Canada.


Most of the stolen bikes are never recovered, with the bulk of bikes going to China and Jamaica.  Jamaica has quite a few black folks, no?  So it must be black folks stealing the bikes, right?  That right there is what you call LOGIC.  Stolen bikes go to Jamaica, Jamaica has a lot of black people, black people must be thieves!  Men like to have sex with women, sex with a woman against her will is rape, men must be rapists!



Don’t worry.  You’ll get the hang of it.

Let’s say the Toronto Police decide to tackle this epidemic of bike thievery by creating a poster campaign:  Don’t Be That Black Guy.



Just because you can pick the lock doesn’t mean you’re allowed to steal the bike.  Don’t Be That Black Guy.  

Just because she left her bike outside the coffee shop for five minutes doesn’t mean you can steal it.  Don’t Be That Black Guy.  

Just because it’s easy to jump the fence into the backyard doesn’t mean you can steal that bike. Don’t Be That Black Guy.


And hey, why stop there?  There are so many crimes we could address by vilifying an entire group of people!



jew Just because you found a wallet doesn’t mean you get to take all the cash before you return it.  Don’t Be That Jewish Guy. bomb

Just because you own both a pressure cooker and some ball bearings doesn’t mean you can build a bomb and kill people with it.  Don’t Be That Muslim Guy.


Just because you found a stray cat doesn’t mean you can kill it and add it to the menu.  Don’t Be That Chinese Guy.



Just because you have allergy pills with pseudoephedrine and some hydrogen chloride lying around doesn’t mean you should cook a batch of crystal meth.  Don’t be that Latino Guy.

I could go on, but surely it’s clear that posters asking men not to be that guy, you know the rapist guy, will be just as effective as posters asking black guys not to be thieves.  And why are these posters not effective?







And the ones that DO? They don’t give a fuck about your stupid posters.  They’re risking their lives and freedom and their livelihoods.  A police officer with a gun might stop them.  Some jackass poster won’t.

What the posters accomplish is to teach men they are natural born rapists.  And to teach women to fear and mistrust men.


To hate them.





All men. It’s  a hate campaign. There is no other word for it. Does this look familiar?




Posters played a key role in convincing the German population that Jews were evil, scary, bad, some “thing” you should hate. And we know how that turned out, don’t we?  Don’t Be That Guy is hate speech, pure and simple.  And the more voices that call it out for what it is, the sooner we can expose the real aims of women’s groups that promote these campaigns. They’re the new Nazis. Sound harsh?  Just too much to swallow?  Think comparing rape campaigns to Jewish propaganda is a false comparison? You might want to think again.  Silence is what makes these campaigns possible.  You may have other things to say about these posters, but say them you must.


first they came


Don’t be that guy.


Lots of love,






In news that will come as no surprise to my critics, everything you read on this blog is a first draft.  I might go back and correct typos, but I have never gone back and done a re-write on any post.  This post has three major errors that I want to correct, with the caveat that the errors were the result of my first draft goes up policy.


1.  A commenter who calls himself Black Yoda at AVfM has quite rightly pointed out that I have left out one major group in my play on racial stereotypes:  white guys.  Allow me to correct that casually racist oversight:




Just because you have a five iron doesn’t make the park your green.

Don’t Be That White Guy




2. My list of what people AREN’T has omitted the statement that MOST JEWISH GUYS AREN’T OBSESSED WITH MONEY.


3. My comparison of the posters to Nazism has a glaring error in that I referred to the Nazi era posters as “Jewish propaganda”.  The correct words would either be “anti-Jewish” or “Nazi”.


Thanks for keeping me on my toes, readers!  Don’t hesitate to call me out on blatant oversights or errors.



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