Tag Archives: Real beauty is priceless

How to spend a ton of money being a “woman” and still be a shrill bitch at the same time.

4 Mar

Jezebel has certainly been a treasure trove of gobsmacking nuttiness this week! In a new post, the infallibly sensible Tracy Moore (she’s one who farts a lot) does a cost benefit analysis on being a woman and it’s the usual *facepalm* level of idiocy one has come to expect from ol’ Jez!



So, apparently, it costs MONEY to be a woman. Here’s all the things ladies must cash up for:






Weight management

To a total of $849 000 over the course of a lifetime!


The average woman spends $65 A WEEK on cosmetics!


Holy fucking Christ! I spend maybe $65 a YEAR on cosmetics and I like Lancome!


As we know, men (who typically have short hair that must be cut much more frequently) do not spend money grooming all the various hair on their bodies. Most dudes do not wear make-up, so yeah, I’ll give her a pass on that one, although Mr. JB has quite the post-shave skin care regime going on. Men do not spend money on clothing or shoes. They do not spend money on stress relieving activities like video games, nor do they spend money taking care of their bodies and maintaining their weights.


Okay, okay. Tracy is simply pointing out that women typically spend MORE money than men on these items.

Because patriarchy. They HAVE TO. It’s all part of the system of oppression. Ladies are FORCED to own 30 pairs of shoes and 200 separate items of clothing and to spend $65 a week on makeup (Jesus that blows my mind). They have NO CHOICE IN THE MATTER. The shoe gestapo is well known for randomly bursting into lady homes and taking a shoe inventory and god help the gal who doesn’t own her requisite 30 pairs.


This is the kind of shit that drives me completely insane when I read Western women complaining about their lot in life.

Here we have a system, set up to benefit WOMEN, with completely voluntary participation and women start screaming because there is a cost associated with taking full advantage of that system. Grooming, hair, makeup, clothing, weight management are all things that women can use to emphasize their sexual attractiveness and then parlay that into some material benefits, should they so choose.


No one is REQUIRED to wear make-up or do their hair up fancy every day. Bullshit. There are BENEFITS associated with doing so, but it always comes down to personal choice. And along with benefits, there are COSTS!


And always, there is this unwritten assumption that men don’t have to do these things. Do the writers have any idea how much razor blades for men cost? Have they ever imagined what it’s like to get up every day and have to shave and wear a suit and tie? The number one aspect of physical appearance that affects men’s income isn’t even one they can control: HEIGHT.


Oh, the injustice of it! Ladies be crying.


And just in case you were thinking that feminism represents the interests of all women, take a good look at their whining over self-imposed sartorial sanctions: $6 000 a year spent on clothing.

$6 000!

Are you fucking kidding me? Oh, hello rich white lady working as a secretary in an office somewhere. Plenty of folks don’t have $6 000 a year to spend on FOOD, never mind the latest taffeta shrug from Zara.


Personally, I’m surprised the costs associated with mental health aren’t higher, since these women are all clearly batshit insane. Apparently, self-help books aren’t particularly effective. Thank god for the blogosphere, eh?

It comes down to this: women want to have all the benefits associated with being feminine, they want the right to NOT ACTUALLY BE FEMININE, and they don’t want to pay for that. Yeah, that seems reasonable. I want all the benefits of an education, but I don’t want to actually become educated and I would like there to be no cost associated with my lack of education.


The reality is that most of these women have completely lost the ability to compete on the basis of femininity, which is, to be certain, a powerful force that can be harnessed and exploited for tremendous gains, and THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT. Men and women alike respond to a man’s height, just as men and women alike respond to a woman’s beauty, which is far more than just what she looks like.


True beauty involves some basic attention to your physical appearance, but it doesn’t have to cost a lot. Don’t be fat. There’s 95% of your beauty problem solved right there. Don’t want to fuss with your hair? Grow it out. A chignon requires a few bobby pins and a trim once or twice a year.


Don’t care to spend a great deal of money on clothes? Buy classics. That’s WHY they’re called classics! They don’t need to be replaced. My professional wardrobe, which I have not worn in over ten years, is hanging in my closest and is still perfectly acceptable for wear because it consists of classic clothing that never goes out of style. And yes, three kids and ten years later, I still fit in every single piece.

But the most important aspect of beauty, which happens to be A) FREE and B) apparently elusive is to have a cheerful heart and a genuine sense of care and concern for the people who surround you. Beauty is about how you interact with the world and the people in it. Be kind, be generous, be thoughtful, be considerate, be gracious, be giving.

In other words, be feminine. Be a woman. It won’t cost you anything and you might just find you gain far more than you could ever imagine. And you’ll probably save a shit ton of money on self-help books, too.

Lots of love,


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