Tag Archives: Sabrina

Shit, I’m doing this wrong!

7 Jan

Katie Baker, writing at Jezebel has noted something interesting about interns who work for no pay: they’re the new housewives of the corporate world!  Neat!


And by housewife, of course she means “highly motivated, dedicated, autonomous, self-directed, multi-tasking and with a skill set of astonishing range and flexibility”.

Oh wait.  No she doesn’t.  By housewife, she means “compliant, silent, submissive and obedient”.


I had to run that one by Mr. JB.  His response?  “Shit honey, you’re doing it wrong”. 

I’ll say.

Leaving aside, for the moment, the issue of unpaid internships, what is up with all this housewife hate at Jezebel?  Could it be that the Shrews of Gawker media have sensed a change in the air?  Check out this comment from Hannali:

Just wanna point out that all of the housewives I know are strong, intelligent, competent women. I’m not sure where this myth came from that all housewives are doormats. Quite frankly, it’s a lie. Are there men that abuse their stay-at-home wives? Yes, but that doesn’t mean that all stay-at-home wives are abused. This stereotype has been around for far too long. I am eighteen years old, in college, with my own job, and yet my dream job is still to be a stay-at-home mom. Nothing would make me happier than to love, to nurture, and to make a home for my family. It makes me sad that society trashes the concept.

Young women like Hannali must scare the bejeebus out of an older generation of feminists.  Yesterday we had Sabrina saying “fuck off slut culture” and today we have Hannali, whose ambition in life is to love and make a home for her family.


The pendulum swings back, as it always does. Let’s do an attitude check, shall we?  What did British men and women say they valued most in a spouse?


Oh my!  Ladies doing housework and men earning money?  Alert the presses!  According to Forbes Magazine, opting out is the new dream for American mothers, too.  According to the annual Forbes survey of working mothers, “ 84% of working women say that staying home to raise children is a financial luxury they aspire to”.



I wonder if that 84% knows that once they become housewives, they will also have to be silent, submissive and obedient?

It’s interesting, isn’t it, that Jezebel likes to portray housewives as some horrifying caricature of femininity stuck halfway between a character out of Les Miserables and an antebellum slave.  When 84% of women surveyed by Forbes ASPIRE to be housewives, where can this caricature come from?

I think Simone de Beauvoir said it best:  “No woman should be authorized to stay at home to raise her children. Society should be totally different. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one.”

Now, who is it again that wants women to be silent, submissive and obedient?  Was it the patriarchy, which understood that women do not like to be parted from their children and created a society that kept families together as a functioning unit, or feminism, that also understands women do not like to be parted from their children BUT DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK WHAT WOMEN WANT?

Shut up, sit down and take it.  Yeah?

fuck you

Well fuck you Simone de Beauvoir and fuck you feminism.  Also, fuck you unpaid interns. Get a degree in something that actually gives you some skills and hey guess what?  People will PAY YOU MONEY.


And Hannali, if you’re gonna keep reading trash like Jezebel, I hope you even it out with some JudgyBitch.

nolite te bastardes carborundorum

Don’t let the bitches grind you down.


Lots of love,


Sabrina, if you don’t want to be defined by your breasts, you’re doing it wrong!

6 Jan

This is Sabrina:

sabrina 2


She is a terrible person, who has started an internet meme that expresses hatred for women, disgust with normal human sexuality and a deep and abiding shame about her own body.  Sabrina, you see, would like to live in a world where she is defined by more than just her breasts.  I know, I know.  What a stupid little tart.  Doesn’t she know that modern woman = slut = power = check out these titties!


Oh, Sabrina.  Your boobs don’t go in your shirt, they go out on display, but remember to always watch out for rapists and shriek mightily if anyone ever NOTICES your tits hanging out all over the place.  Now all you breastfeeding ladies, don’t get excited.  Your breasts are disgusting and revolting and feeding a baby is just gross and probably really unnatural, so put your tits away, please.  This doesn’t concern you.


Sabrina sparked a bit of a trend, with other young women expressing discomfort with a wider culture that encourages them to spread their legs, wear skanky clothes and slather their faces with make-up.  You see, some young women do not like slut culture and hate being lumped in with peers who have embraced the whole “your worth can only be measured by your whore rating” .




Now let’s be clear.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with a young woman understanding the value of her sexuality and deciding to exchange it for straight up cash.  A young woman who appreciates the costs and freely chooses to be a prostitute has every right to do so, but there is a huge problem with young women who want to take full advantage of the benefits of sexuality without living up to any of the responsibilities or meeting any of the obligations that sexuality entails.

And what are those responsibilities and obligations?  When you deliberately provoke a reaction in the people around you in the hopes of capitalizing on that reaction, you accept the possibility that the reaction may be more intense or powerful than you imagined.  You also accept that the people around you may decide to provoke their own reactions using the assets they have available to them.  When a young woman deliberately and overtly displays her sexuality in the form of make-up, clothing, attitude,  voice, mannerisms and demeanor, she needs to understand that the objects of her provocation will RESPOND.

Male sexuality is profoundly different than women’s. It is, at the very heart, a very aggressive kind of sexuality.  Women want attention, admiration, to be desired and yearned after.  Walking around with your cleavage spilling out of a Victoria’s Secret bra and your lips painted glossy red is a sure way to get those things, but you are playing with a sexuality that wants far more than just that.  Slut culture posits that female sexuality, and the advantages that can be accrued thereby, are morally and culturally superior to a more base, male sexuality.  Male sexuality is curtailed, castrated and derided as crude, rude and increasingly, illegal.

Young women like Sabrina are saying “hold up!  I’m okay with interacting socially on the basis of something OTHER than sexuality”, although that is never really an option.  Platonic relationships between men and women are historical anomalies, and the current of sexual possibility is never far from the surface of the relational waters.


Sabina and her ilk are accused of “slut-shaming” because they dare to suggest that maybe breasts are sexually suggestive and it’s a good idea to display them judiciously or maybe not at all, that a woman’s value is determined by something other than spreading her legs, that clothing makes a statement and has an impact on other people and that we are responsible, at least in part, for ensuring that we understand the consequences of our sartorial choices.

If I wore this item of clothing, I would expect to get a reaction:


I would furthermore expect that reaction to be really BAD.  That’s a no-brainer.  But I should be able to wear this and expect NO reaction:

not asking

Well, darling, if you are not asking for “it”, what are you asking for?  To live in a world where no one has any reaction to anything anyone else is doing, ever?  I’m not saying you’re delusional, sweetheart, but I hope you brought extra cotton candy for your unicorn, because it could be a long night.


In Magical Princess Fairytime Sparkly World, women can walk around bare ass naked at all times, plastered out of their minds and no one will touch them ever or say anything suggestive or even acknowledge that they exist.  Evidently, there are no men in Magical Princess Fairytime Sparkly World.  Hmmmm. Could that be the point?


Here in the real world, people exists and they have drives and desires and will respond to stimuli and not always in a way you might like.  In this world, you will do well to be aware of the people around you, take notice of the impact you are having and deploy some strategies to make certain you are perceived in a way that values you as a person in your own right.

In this world, your boobs?  They go in your shirt.

Lots of love,



PS:  Sabrina, you are a doll!



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