Feminist Housewife? I don’t think so.

20 Mar


Aww, it’s so cute to watch the lovely feminist ladies at Jezebel try to make sense of the housewives profiled in New York Magazine who value men and babies more than money and cubicles.  How can this be?



First up, we get class snarkiness.  Why, one of those ladies is rich and she lives in Manhattan, of all places!  I wonder which part of New York Magazine led them to believe that women in Wyoming would be profiled?  Gosh, now that is a mystery.

“I’m really grateful that my husband and I have fallen into traditional gender roles without conflict”, says Patricia Ireland, one of the housewives interviewed. You know, those traditional gender roles that lead to a more satisfying sex life, greater wealth and just general overall happiness.


My goodness!  Why would any woman choose that?  Jezebel twists herself into a big knot trying to deny that there is some biological imperative for women to WANT to be at home with their small children. No, no, no.  Gender and gender roles are 100% socially constructed. The only reason women prefer to be in the company of children is socialization.  It’s a nefarious plot of the patriarchy to ensure that women are actually happy and fulfilled denied the opportunity to pay someone else (another woman, usually) to raise her children while she files papers or works as support staff or takes care of other people for less money than her husband earns.




I find it interesting that the MORE intelligent a woman is, the MORE educated she is, the MORE likely she is to be at home with her small children.


Know why that is?


Because those women dodged the bullet previous generations of women aimed straight at them in an effort to shatter a social structure that has delivered incalculable luxuries and technologies and privileges and protections and comforts.  Everything from antibiotics to iPhones, from flushing toilets to push-up bras has been invented by men, and those older ladies were pissed to the hell, neglecting to recall that all of those men had MOTHERS who made it possible for their genius to shine.



See, feminism is all about choice.  Women should have all the same choices as men, at the same time.  Except two:

No housewives.


“No woman should be authorized to stay at home and raise her children. Women should not have that choice, precisely because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one.”

No hookers.


Hmm.  The two things women are really good at.  The two oldest professions.


The two women interviewed by New York Magazines identify as feminists themselves. Now how’s that for some cognitive dissonance?  No, you can’t be a housewife AND a feminist.  That’s like being a creationist AND believing in evolution.  The whole point of the one is to deny the other.

What is the rationale behind the vitriol against housewives at Jezebel and across other feminist websites?  I think they are responding to a change in the cultural tides, and one that does not bode well for the theory of female supremacy.  More and more young women can see the truth, that a woman’s highest calling is caring for her own children under the protection of the children’s father.





The problem isn’t, and never has been, women’s ambitions to work outside the home. The problem has been the uncritical acceptance of a male timeline to accomplish those goals.


Most women won’t work at anything particularly productive or useful and our society will hardly crumble without their epic levels of artistic or scientific or technological genius.


And that’s okay.  There is nothing wrong with women having a different sort of genius.  The problem comes in denying that difference in service to an ideology when the facts and the biological realities are so very different.


Young women feel torn that their most heartfelt desires are for a relationship with a man, and they live in a culture that tells them they should feel guilty to long for husbands and children more than accolades (which will be few and far between) and accomplishments (also pretty scant).


Contrary to what a lot of readers seem to think, I think women are smart and capable and assertive and perfectly adept of sorting through the conflicting messages the dominant culture sends them, and they seem to be doing just that, in ever increasing numbers.  There are two giant problems that need to be addressed before we will see the re-emergence of the nuclear family as the primary social unit.

Women first need to throw off the shackles of an ideology that insists they are exactly equal to men and whenever they aren’t (hello faculty of engineering) it must be the fault of men. That kind of thinking denies reality and encourages women to see themselves as perpetual victims, and there is nothing quite like the self-fulfilling prophesy of the victimhood mentality.

Remember all those second wave feminists who didn’t need any bicycles and who hated babies? Gloria Steinem?  Germaine Greer? Ring a bell?   Yeah.  Married and throwing cash at IVF clinics in a futile bid to have those hated babies now.  Victims of their own misguided and utterly false beliefs about the importance of men and children and relationships and families and love.

not preg

Don’t make that mistake, ladies.  You’ll regret it. We need a new celebration of the fact that women are not better than men, nor worse:  we are different.  That’s not just okay, it’s wonderful!

The second major problem we need to address is that there are now almost ZERO incentives or rewards for men to support a wife at home with children.  Why should they work long and hard to provide all the material comforts of life to women, only to have those women walk away with all the spoils AND the children too, in divorce?  Marriage has turned into a rotten deal for men.


Now that women are starting to see that, oh, oops, marriage and being a stay at home mother is actually a super-sweet deal, it’s time to start sweetening the deal for men, too.  That will take some concerted political effort, since so much of the bitterness for men is actually enshrined in law.  Divorce, custody and spousal support laws all have to change.  The importance of fatherhood needs to be openly celebrated and acknowledged.


That won’t be easy.  But it’s very necessary.


The first thing we need to do is ignore the mewlings of liberal feminists with their kitchen-bitch husbands and their kids being raised by some poor woman while they moan about how unfair and difficult their lives are.

Most of those women would be at home, too, but they “have to” work. Because they made crappy choices.  They believed the lies.  And now it’s just sour fucking grapes.


Being angry at women who made sure they DID have choices is not the answer. If you want to be angry, be angry at the women who don’t think you should have the choice at all.

You don’t actually need Simone’s authorization to do anything.  But if you want to be at home raising your own children, you will need a man who is willing to support you.


Just what feminists hate.  That’s okay.  I hate them right back.  You should, too.

Lots of love,


29 Responses to “Feminist Housewife? I don’t think so.”

  1. Erudite Knight March 20, 2013 at 16:29 #

    A real women WOULD want to be home, raising the kids. Not in a lazy dodging-work kind of way easy. So you finally got some videos going eh Jb?


  2. Erudite Knight March 20, 2013 at 16:30 #

    BTW, do you have some setting that every comment has to be approved? My comments hang out in limbo.


  3. judgybitch March 20, 2013 at 16:44 #

    Yeah, sorry Knight. Tens of thousands of haters, all needing to be shown the door.

    They’ll lose interest soon enough.


  4. Liz March 20, 2013 at 17:00 #

    Tens of thousands? Lordy!
    Nutters gonna nut.


  5. judgybitch March 20, 2013 at 17:02 #

    Yesterday was nuts!

    Lots of potaters, tryin’ to potate.


  6. Alex March 20, 2013 at 19:42 #

    essentially their argument is they want all the stuff men get by actually doing work without doing the work, and then bitch when they have to do the work anyways and blame others for their bad decisions. i thought there was only supposed to be a few of them in the world


  7. southsidesocialist March 20, 2013 at 20:05 #

    You don’t understand feminism, or gender.


  8. Mark March 20, 2013 at 21:23 #

    I think feminist hatred of housewives is easy to explain with simple rationality. As a movement, feminism wants what everyone wants: power; power and money. Equality never had anything to do with it.

    Forcing as many women off to work as possible (whether they really want it or not), and into predominantly male workplaces (whether they’re capable or not) increases the likelihood of women obtaining traditional positions of power and influence, as well as the amount of money women obtain collectively… even while feminists insist on women retaining control over children and access. Thus, feminists want women to retain both typical female bastions of influence (as mother and wife; or as nurse and schoolteacher) and take control over typical male bastions of influence (corporate boards of directors and parliaments). They want to keep getting child support and government aid at the expense of men, in addition to a man’s salary, all for less work invested.

    Simone de Beauvoir’s denunciation of female individual choice is at the core of feminism. It was reiterated by Catherine McKinnon, who said that all sexual intercourse is rape because an individual female cannot consent to sex because of the situation of women as a collective.

    Essentially, feminism (speaking of the mainstream; I’m not concerned with outliers) denounces the idea of the individual woman. It’s basically gender-fascism. Consider the ‘fasces,’ a bundle of sticks bound to an axe, the symbol of fascism, of militant collectivism. For feminists there is the Sisterhood, just as for German fascists there was das Volk. Technically, that means ‘the people,’ but not like ‘die Menschen’ which is the plural of the work for one person ‘der Mensch.’ When it comes to the Volk, or the Sisterhood, the individual merely exists as a component of the collective, into which it must be subsumed, or it will be discarded.

    Hence why every individual female choice must be evaluated, for feminists, in the context of women as a collective. It may be pink rather than red and black, but the idea of the Sisterhood or ‘female essence’ are as thoroughly fascist as the idea of the master race.


  9. Mike Hunter March 20, 2013 at 22:01 #

    Maybe you should create a haters thread just for them. Only let them post on that thread. I think it would be entertaining!


  10. Frozen Tempest March 20, 2013 at 22:10 #

    You’re being talked about over at Free The Animal too.


  11. Andy March 20, 2013 at 22:11 #

    Don’t let the haters win JB. We love you.


  12. Andy March 20, 2013 at 22:13 #

    Oh and southsidesocialist. You are a parasite on the UK, please go and get a proper job or a man to look after you and stop spending other people’s money on your idiot left wing politics.


  13. TMG March 20, 2013 at 22:16 #

    You’re going to call me a cruel and horrible person but I’d frankly be happier seeing feminists live miserable lives then being stay at home mothers. Women are never going to change until the pain of changing is less then the pain of staying the same, and if women are going to find peace and satisfaction as SAHM mothers while also trumpeting the Feminist hate cult that is destroying society, that’s a damn shame.


  14. Alex March 20, 2013 at 22:32 #



  15. Mike Hunter March 20, 2013 at 22:40 #

    Honestly I don’t know how the current system could be sweetened enough to make getting married worth it for me. The only advantages I see to marriage is for tax purposes, or children.

    Those tax advantages only become useful if you’re married to someone else making much less then you, in which case you’re basically supporting them [no offense JB]. So that doesn’t make much sense from an economic standpoint.

    As far as children I don’t want anymore. But even if I did the only advantage getting married would provide me would be: that I would be able to stop the adoption of one of my children without dealing with my states punitive father registry.

    Other then those two reasons name one thing that a wife can do, that a live in girlfriend can’t.

    Oh also I thought I’d repost something I found on A Voice For Men. I thought it was funny and very truthful. It seemed to describe my situation almost perfectly. Only my timetable was about half of this guys was. Also instead of marrying some bitch, I moved in with her; and she promptly became “accidentally pregnant” after lying to me about the status of her fertility.

    Year 1 – Newlywed phase. Missed warning signal #1 – you put up with her hyphenating her surname with yours just to make her happy. You’re buying household stuff which naturally thrills most chicks. Joint banking & credit accounts set up, houses purchased, life insurance, etc. Still getting laid regularly as long as she isn’t pregnant or in a crappy mood for no reason.

    Year 2 – Reality Bites – Wife cuts her hair in most current micro length style and puts on at least twenty pounds. She wants to eat out and shop with her friends all of the time since you are always gone working anyway. Probably still some sex going on if you don’t mind doing it with a fat, Marine looking version of the chick you married. She discovers that if she charges shit on the “joint” credit cards you will pay it off if she refuses, whines or makes excuses. You’re starting to think WTF did I get myself into.

    Years 3 to 6 – Indentured Servitude – Kids are popped out. By far the best thing you’ve ever been involved in. The wife who promised she’d always want to work decides that she doesn’t now that the kids hit the ground so you need to figure out how to get yourself another 50% more income to cover for her epiphany. Meaningful sex during which you actually think positively about the woman you married is history. If and when it happens it’s done in spite of disagreements about the kids, money, feminism and her relatives wanting to borrow money to start a business or have you cosign for a loan for a boob job for her niece. I guess this explains the current popularity of Viagra, not that it was around back when I was married. The only respite you get is spending time with your kids and escaping the wife while at work where at least some level of reason and logic is still welcome and valued.

    Years 7 to 8 – Exit Strategy – You’ve figured out it isn’t ever going to work and that she has no problem with ruining your life to assure her comfort. Basically zero sex going on now. She knows you have nothing but contempt for her and is totally focused on the kids and spending money that she doesn’t earn. You’re trying to figure out how to drop the bitch without having to live in a pup tent and never see your kids again.

    Year 9 to 10 – The BIG D – Finally one of you has had enough and files. Nasty attorney conversations, threats and expense. Candid personal conversation with soon to be ex that if she expects alimony she can try to collect when you’re in the wind. Ultimate recognition that she is such a miserable human being that no matter what it costs you’ll pay just so you never have to look at her face again. You walk away from home equity, paid off vehicles, retirement plans and 401Ks just to lose the bitch. She knows how much you hate it which makes her exceptionally pleased with herself.

    Years 11 to Whenever – early years normally consist of living with friends & relatives or in studio apartments or rented rooms while you pay enough in child support to finance a Ferrari and your wife and kids live in your house. Kids are primarily with the ex which give her a great platform for alienating them from you.

    Postscript – 10 to 20 years post Divorce – At some point your kids grow up and see the ex for what she is in spite of her lobbying against you. They’ve moved out and will have nothing to do with her now. She’s now 75 lbs. overweight and on the verge of bankruptcy. You’re recovered financially and are rocking life. You’d talk about the girlfriend(s) but you don’t want to brag or throw it into anyone’s face. Suffice it to say there are no shortage of cool women around as long as the relationship is set up properly. That doesn’t include marriage give our current realities.

    That’s kinda my version. I’m sure every divorced guy here has their own.


  16. TMG March 20, 2013 at 23:14 #

    I agree, and as much as I appreciate women like JB and others trying to shake stuff up, the reality is that more men every day are swearing off marriage permanently.

    As far as I am concerned, women can offer me all the cooking, cleaning, and sex they want. It’s not going to make me think marriage is a good idea.


  17. Ter March 20, 2013 at 23:44 #

    Have you tried the filter settings where you can enter a list of words (eg. if you see commonality in content from the haters) that will automatically move it to your spam or trash? You can also ban by IP if you notice a pattern – though this is through a plugin so I’m not sure how that would work with the .com version of wordpress..


  18. Ter March 20, 2013 at 23:52 #

    Re: “… they live in a culture that tells them they should feel guilty to long for husbands and children more than accolades (which will be few and far between)”

    Actually, I believe that’s one of the two main reasons for why we have so many women’s-only business networks and events – to ensure that accolades go to women – having excluded male competitors. The other main reason is to reassure each other that these women-only events are necessary because of ‘the patriarchy’ which they believe is the root cause of any/all of women’s difficulties in the business world.

    Alternatively, interesting that someone like Margaret Thatcher, who publicly declared her contempt for feminism, was able to rise to be Prime Minister of England among mostly men. I believe if she had the victim mentality of a feminist then she never would have made it.


  19. someguy March 21, 2013 at 00:15 #

    You still need to do one more thing. My guess as to why feminism started in the first place was not only because the typical wife didn’t have to slave away at home thx to technological innovation, but also because she was staying at home with nothing to do but cleaning the home, after the kids and husband are gone to school and work respectively. She knew nothing of how the world worked since it was her husband that took care of business. SO she is stuck at home nothing to do. It gives you a feeling that the home is a prison. I have felt it myself since I live with parents and they and my brother all work and during school holidays I’m at home with nothing to do. Her husband: her main source of companionship is mostly not there thx to all the work he needs to do.

    SO the next thing that needs to be done is to allow people to work from home. We have the technology to make this happen. Computer networks between bosses and employees can now be setup. No need for giant skyscrapers filled with cubicle after cubicle.

    But then this would have been a good idea, if it weren;t for the fact that most office cubicles are being filled by women and not men, and men tend to take jobs that involve travel and on site presence (especially true for consulting/engineering/tech work). Oh well… I tried.


  20. Andrea March 21, 2013 at 13:32 #

    I haven’t been on Jezebel in a while but I remember a couple of years back, they had a writer named “slut machine”. That was her moniker. She was all proud of it and you weren’t going to slut shame her!!! Anyways, lo and behold, Slut Machine gets married! All of a sudden, she now becomes Tracie Egan and actually writes a post about getting married, how she changed her moniker because she doesn’t want her mother-in-law finding out about it. Wait, what happened to not slut shaming and being proud of what she was? Needless to say, all the commenters were proud that she was getting married and they understood. That just about sums up the whole hypocritical POS Jezebel site.


  21. Kai March 21, 2013 at 20:07 #

    Don’t forget to check the laws in your jurisdiction. In some places there is no functional difference between a wife and a live-in girlfriend, and even without marrying her, you can end up on the hook if she decides she was ‘functionally married’ when you split up.


  22. Kai March 21, 2013 at 20:09 #

    There are different degrees of feminism. These women likely call themselves feminists because they wanted to be able to get an education and get a decent job, and then have the *choice* to leave that world and stay home with their children instead.
    There is a big difference in satisfaction with a situation you feel you have no alternative to, compared to one you chose at the expense of other options. Women who see feminism’s gains as the ability to make choices – as long as you deal with the options your choices cut out – are not the enemy.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Kai March 21, 2013 at 20:13 #

    The aspect I see wrong with this is the universality of the declarations – ‘All men are x, and all women are y’.
    I support women in traditional situations because that makes a majority of them happy, and works very well for the world. But i understand why the last generation didn’t want that. Because if it’s your only option, it’s a lot less satisfying.
    I’d like to see some recognition that people fall on a scale, and thus the majority of women will tend to do/want/choose x, while the majority of men will tend to do/want/choose y, but that doesn’t make it wrong or unacceptable for an atypical woman to go for the y or some men for the x.
    There are definitely differences between the sexes, but it isn’t dichotomous.


  24. Kai March 21, 2013 at 23:25 #

    It was easy to argue that women wanted equality when they were asking for things that men had where they thought they also belonged, and then a few more things that men had that they didn’t. Over time, their actions demonstrated that they wanted everything men had and more, but without giving up any of their traditional benefits. It is now extremely clear that ‘equality’ is nowhere near their goal.


  25. Mike Hunter March 22, 2013 at 04:44 #

    Common law marriage isn’t recognized where I live.


  26. Z March 22, 2013 at 04:50 #

    I used to feel differently but I think sluts need to be shamed. They spread disease all over the place and create lots of babies they won’t take care of that my taxpayer dollars will be taking care of.

    I think it’s skanky if guys sleep around too much, too, but all this drunken, whorish, casual sex is disgusting. And I’m tired of being made to feel like an awful hater for calling a spade a spade.

    These women have no self-respect. So why should I respect them.


  27. Kai March 22, 2013 at 15:24 #

    oh good!


  28. mamaziller June 4, 2013 at 22:30 #

    love you blog!!


  29. judgybitch June 4, 2013 at 22:31 #



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